Sometimes when I touch something I have to touch all of the object and with both hands, otherwise I feel incomplete.

I really enjoy self-pity.

I have to fart real bad but people are around me , so I try to silent fart

I stick one foot out of my blanket so I'm not hot or cold.

I constantly try to turn something I say into my catch phrase.

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when you can't think of anything to type you just type random letters. a;lsdfj;ldfkjsfasdfljf

I have one of those automatic shower cleaners. After I press the button, it beeps 15 times before starting. I have to get out my brush, get out the hair dryer, plug it in, and Turin it on before the 15th beep. Every time.

you wonder if things look the same through other peoples eyes

when i'm in the shower and i close my eyes, i thnk something's gonna be there to scare me when i open my eyes again.

pick your nose and eat it

whenever I lost a tooth my parents would while I slept they would sprinkle caster sugar on the window sill and make footprints in it (tiny footprints)

Pretend that when you are in the shower, the shower head is a giant machine gun, that takes thousands of men to operate, and that you were an extremely large person and you catch ALL of the bullets in your mouth, spitting them at the shower head while at the same time turning off the water as if they all died, and the small drips that continue to drop out were the dead soldires' blood.....-dillon

Lick my cell phone screen to clean it.

Whenever I look in the bathroom mirror, I fear that I will see a terrible bloody monster standing behind me. I convince myself of this so completely that I panic and rush out right after I pee.

when i meet ppl i often think of them as if two other ppl i know had a baby even if they are the same sex.

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when you bleed you suck your own blood

Say a word I just learned over and over again until it loses meaning.

feel legitimately bad for Wile E Coyote whenever he does not get the road runner

Always think "what if ghosts really ARE everywhere?" when I'm naked in the shower, or getting dressed, or any other private and/or embarrassing moment. Then get really freaked out and picture 6 people from 1902 watching you.

Seperate your food on you dinner plate

I scrape the scum off my teeth with my fingernail and then I eat it.

when im lying in bed in summer and im hot i just turn my sheets on the other side so its cool again

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.