Turn the Microwave off at 1 second

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When you walk across a cross walk and you stretch your steps so it takes one step for each line, yet you still try to look casual because ur in public

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I feel that getting a 98 on a test is better than getting a 99.

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Tells a joke only you thought was funny and still laughs then laughs harder because your the only one laughing nikki

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I tend to ignore phone calls, even when I know the phone call could be important.

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taking your t shirt or sweatshirt off quickly so nothing gets you while its over your face

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When I am doing something that involves using one hand I feel weird because I don't know what to do with my other hand

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having cool friends, but all of their other friends are nerds.

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Have a fantasy where Jesus Christ is jackhammering Mickey Mouse in the doo-doo hole with a lawn dart while Garth Brooks gives birth to something resembling a cheddar cheese log with almonds on Santa Claus's tummy-tum.

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Wondering who would cry at your funeral

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When someone is talking to me and I'm not really listening, when it gets quiet I say 'that's crazy' so they think I'm listening.

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Boy:did it hurt? Me: Did what hurt? Boy:When you fell from heaven. Me: I came frome the pits of hell! Boy: Well then...O__O

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Hide important things in places at home but forget later where you hid them.

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i have my own way of eating every chocolate bar i eat, layer by layer

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Run the shower before you get in/ move out the way of the water to let it warm up first

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I always find myself criticizing some commercials on television like the first time I see them I think nothing of it but the third or fourth time I think hey wait a second...

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Pick your dead skin then eat it.

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When I aak someone out it takes me 3-6 attempts to get the words out

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I use two pillows as I sleep, but I don't put them under my head, I put my head in between them.

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Buy tons of movies and only watch them once. Rarely buy books and reread them a million times.

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Take out all the marshmallows in a bowl of Lucky Charms, eat the "cat food" (the dry cereal that looks like dry kitty food!), then put the marshmallows back in the milk and eat them!

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When I am driving, I hate everyone else who is driving.

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Sometimes when I'm watching a sitcom, I get distracted from the jokes because the characters are in a bedroom and I start focusing on the awesome stuff they have.

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I sometimes feel the desire to grab something fragile and - not out of anger, just because it would be funny - hurl it across the room to watch it explode.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.