Never tell her who I was talking to on the phone and watch her nosy butt get upset

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My most intimate moments are constantly interrupted by the same thought..."oh, God...what if there is a secret security cam in here...CUT TO: oh God...can my dead grandparents see me now????"

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Hearing someone singing a song and stopping midway, so you need to finish it.

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I say random stuff when I wake up. Just to make sure my voice is still working.

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I like to eat the crust on pizzas

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Thinking about what you want to dream about while brushing your teeth at night.

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Add numbers on license plates of cars around me while waiting at a light.

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whenever im doing sumthing im not suppose to i feel like everybody knows what im doing

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worry about getting a little butt sweat mark on a chair if you've been sitting in it too long while its hot.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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I split my gum in half so I can chew on both sides.

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You tell your friends that you hate the Rick roll'd song even though you secretly like it.

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Sometimes I toot.

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It takes half as long to take a dump if I forget my phone.

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Get turned on when you see a girl yawn

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When in bed, I fold a small section of the covers in my hand to make a point and poke my fingers with it.

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Instead of scratching my balls with my hand I rub them vigorously on the bed

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Touching your nipples at night wondering if anyone else wanted to touch them all day :)

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Go on this site to feel normal.

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I eat something and read book/newspaper/magazine at the same time. Then i take food crumbs off the book and eat them too.

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turn the colour down on your tv and pretend what you are watching is an old movie

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log out of any social network sites so that when im on a website it doesnt somehow send messages to my profile

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Wonder if the life your living is one long dream and your gonna wake up and be some type of alien.

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When you are looking over someones shoulder and they look at you thinking you are staring at them so you suddenly turn your head

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.