Sometimes when walking, accidently fart and then try to squeak my to sound like my shoes squeaked instead of me farting.

I imagine that there are lines coming out from things and I don't step on the lines (columns, buildings, walls, corners, etc.)

Saying an awkward word enough times so that it doesn't sound like a real word anymore

sometimes I get so bored watching tv that I have an incredible urge to throw the remote at the tv. I would never do it, but I always fear I might and break the tv.

Apply hand sanitizer after fapping.

Whenever I fart, I always smell it. But when other people fart, I don't want to smell it.

Erasing the history cache on the computer after visiting an x rated website.

I love touching, squeezing and occasionally biting my dog's (read: any dog's) muzzle. I love the texture and the gummy-ness. I also love how pissed he gets when I do it and sneezes after.

always get sports injuries, never get any attention from them

Sometimes I look at security cameras and start to act suspiciously like I'm up to something... but really... I'm not.

On a calendar search for the picture on your birthday month

Do an epic air drum solo while listening to Phil Colins "In The Air Tonight"

Read and laugh at about any top comment here... because it happens to me too.

When I hear footsteps approaching while I'm sitting on the toilet, I'm getting ready to jump at the door in case I actually forgot to lock it.

I really hate the sound of sqeaking balloons

I sometimes want to eat spaghetti with my hands, but for whatever reason have never done it...

When I watch a movie that terrifies me, I usually find myself sitting on the sofa with a kitchen knife in my hand at the end of the movie.

Click an invisible pen I think is in my hand but is not constantly everyday.

I read the down voted posts

Sometimes I have a dream in the morning that I checked my clock but then when I wake up Im perplexed when Ive gone back in time -Ethan

I DO wish I had the ability of the guy in the comment below me. Moral: Yeah I have to type moral down here, because its awesome and because whatever its awesome!

When I see that someone else is typing while I'm texting them, I try to quickly finish what I'm typing and send it so that I won't have to change my response.

Pronounce hors d'oeuvres 'whores-dev-ers' thinking I'm so witty.

think that the NSA is always watching what you do online at any time you are even connected.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.