Pay attention to commercial breaks to see if there is ever a break without an advertisement about cars or new movies coming out

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expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

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Fake an orgasm after only 30 seconds, watch the "wtf" look on her face then laugh hysterically.

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Say "Up and Down" for "Left or Right"

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I waTch 2 GIRLS AND 1 CUP AND I FAPPED THOSE BITCHES MANY TIMES! HELL YEA! /M\

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Picking my nose.

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Make calculations with house number. Eg: House nº 112 means house nº 4

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HAPPY BIRTHDAY GLENDA!!!

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Layer the water in the toilet with toilet paper, so when I poo the water does splash back up and splatter poo and water all over my bum

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I sometimes deliberately miss buses or trains even though I could easily board them.

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If im taking a crap in the public washrooms and someone walks in I try to make covering noise as soon as its about to plop.

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log out of any social network sites so that when im on a website it doesnt somehow send messages to my profile

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I wonder what a baby is laughing about when they are apparently being entertained by something in the room I can't see

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thinking "what if people can read my mind" then cant stop thinking dirty things about people around me

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Feeling sorry for inanimate objects

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Imagine flying things and epic battles when listening to music.

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Can't stop tears from comeing to your eyes when singing

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Taking your headphones/earbuds off a lot to see if your music is playing loudly. Or to see if other people could possibly hear it

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Rub a pen tip between my fingers.

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get a new *to you* car, and suddenly every other car on the road is the same make/ model..... hey look! an outback!

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When masturbating at night, looking at the window paranoid that someone is watching. But stopping or moving out of view.

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When you have the " If I'm on an elevator and it breaks and is about to crash at the bottom, and I jump up before it does, will I live?" thought.

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I **** with no hands.

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Laying in bed at a friends place with your eyes closed imaging where you would end up if you got up and went to the toilet as if it was your own house.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.