Sneeze for a few minutes when I've eaten too much.

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Ur mum

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whenever I use a public stall I pretend Im not there to avoid unwanted attention

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Go outside to meet a friend but he cancelled so you stay in your garage so your parents don't know you're there

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Sometimes when I look in the mirror I act out a scene like Tyra banks coming up to me and asking me to be on America's next top model.

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Sleeping with one leg under the blanket and one out.

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Show all your friends this website to prove your not as strange as they think you are.

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Pretend you and your classmates are in a Hunger Games scenario.

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When well dressed, someone ask me what I do for a living, I say nothing and watch the confused look come over their face.

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Hide your I pod when your parents walk in at 12pm and then go back to what ever you were doing when they leave.

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Wipe a soda can after somebody else in my family drinks out of it just in case I get sick or I may feel there spit.

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So has anyone else ever been in the middle of doing something and at the exact moment something happens and you sort of wonder if it happened because of what you did.

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Write a word then wonder if it's spelt with an i or and e so just put them both in but do it in such a way that the person reading it won't know whether you didn't know the spelling or misspelled it then realized your mistake and tried to fix it.

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Reading your facebook posts that you wrote a year ago or more, and think of how stupid you were at that time.

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When you're walking and think of something funny and start laughing, but you don't want people to think you're weird, so you pull out your phone and pretend you're texting.

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What do you call a rapist in your house? Your father.

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Thinking you're very popular after you have owned someone at school.

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Layer the water in the toilet with toilet paper, so when I poo the water does splash back up and splatter poo and water all over my bum

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Whenever you shave, you make sure you cut both ends of your moustache, leaving a small patch in the middle above your lips. Then you pretend to be Hitler ;)

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Sitting on toilet after pooping without wiping for longer than a minute because your in your phone.

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I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

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I doodle on everything I get that can be doodled on, even my exams :)

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right after I turn the shower off I jump up and down to get rid of the extra water all over me...

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Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.