see if I can hold my breath when walking down a long hallway

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Trying to do things before the microwave beeps .

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Pretend my ski pole is a gun while I'm on the chair lift. Or just any object around when I'm not skiing.

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accidently sleep on my arm and it falls asleep

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I doodle on everything I get that can be doodled on, even my exams :)

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When you lie in bed and imagine scenarios that will never happen.

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Wipe the salt off your hand on your right pant leg after eating salty fries from fast food restaurants.

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Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

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I take a poop and then stand up to pee because I'm a man

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When no one is home, I poop with the door open, just because I can.

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get happy as sh*t when you remember your homework is do after your lunch period so you can do it then, but never end up doing it.

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When the good guy in a movie is in a bad situation, I imagine myself doing something different that seems more legit.

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Have a big twitch, freak out when you are dosing off in class but suddenly wake up.

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Spend ages searching for a porno (normally about 40 minutes), search through it for the best bit, finish and think "what was the point of all that"

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Blink and pretend that you just took a picture with your eyes.

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Complimenting a girl awkwardly,and then smiling stupidly later and thinking of alternate versions of the conversation that happened!!

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Laugh when something happens to someone, but when the exact same happens to you, you say "Its not funny"

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You question gods existence and evolution but then quickly tell herself hes real so you don't get struck with a lighting bolt

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I try to not step on the lines on the sidewalk

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I am a masculine guy but in private I listen to very sensitive songs. ie: careless wispers

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Try to time the traffic light so that when I snap, my light turns green. Always so so close.

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When I'm walking on pavement or tiles I always make patterns, e.g stepping on every second tile, stepping a certain amount of times on each bit of pavement

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You or someone you know has a secret crush/liking but the always shout it to the world. My sister does that.(It's why I ask)

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cover myself in vaseline and roll around on the floor pretending im a slug

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.