Wipe the salt off your hand on your right pant leg after eating salty fries from fast food restaurants.

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Hate when people ask "do you have a bathroom?" It's like "no we crap in the yard!"

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When I Download A Song Or Movie And The Download Speed Slows Down I Think The FBI Is Tracking Me.

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I try to say something, but a bunch of people are talking at the same time so I yell at them to shut up and as soon as I say something I realize I was wrong so I say"okay" as calm as possible to keep from looking like a douche

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I can't step on the cracks of sidewalks.

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Stab myself on a daily basis

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Thinking that out there, on this earth in a lost city, there is an awesome clone of you.

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always get sports injuries, never get any attention from them

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I scratch and sniff.

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Run into a wall and say "I'm sorry" and then realize that it's just a wall.

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I pee on the bathroom sink everytime, because I am lazy to open the toilet, even when I visit other people, sorry friends and family =)

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When playing a game you refer to the kid you don't know as "kid" - ar2

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play Simpsons episodes in my head...way too often

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i leave tv on when i sleep...cant close it cause i hate to hear....noices...in my bedroom that cant identify......

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I watch American football with the sound down low because the announcers are always trying to tell us that we didn't see what we just saw when the referees make bad calls

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Can't stop tears from comeing to your eyes when singing

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When I fart in public, I always pretend that nothing ever happened.

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Opening the fridge door, then trying to accomplish pouring a drink, before the door seals itself forever leaving the cola to the mercy of the outside world.

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Rub a pen tip between my fingers.

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Imagine I'm being filmed in a reality TV show just so I could do something productive or interesting.

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Sometimes when I fart while sitting down, I lift one leg up.

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Mouth words to people wearing headphones to try and get them to take them off.

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Accidentally scratching a surface and then scratching it again with the tops of your fingernails to even it out.

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Whenever I pull a long hair from my vagina or butt, it feels good.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.