I sometimes start thinking about very non sexual things in the middle of masturbation, like what I'm going to wear the next day.

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Whenever you make cereal, you eat exactly where you make it like on the table.

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When a book is boring, i will think of my favouite song and then i will start singing the book, like i will look at the words and ligit, start singing them in my favourite tune~im so weird

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eat cake in a bowl with milk the way you would eat a bowl of cereal

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Try to find the perfect stride length so you don't have to walk all weird to avoid stepping on a sidewalk crack. Fail miserably but keep walking weird.

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The power to put a pointless super power on thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com

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After reading something from this site, I find myself compelled to try it.

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jump down the stairs when im almost down to save time

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I'm a man. When I'm watching a movie with my wife and it has a sad ending. I allways have to cry but moments before the actual end has come I allready start to snif my nose so that she thinks I have a cold and do not have to cry about the ending of the movie.

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Ask me if an outfit makes you look fat? I'll say VERY!

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expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

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Burglars have become very clever. Just last night my wife turned to me and said that she hears burglars downstairs so I got up quietly checked every room suddenly I realised that I don't have a wife.

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trying to piss after masturbation hurts.

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Picking my nose.

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getting excited when you find a recycled tissue in your robe/sweatshirt so you don't know have to get up to get one yourself?

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I ship Bolin and Korra as a romance and a bromance. Am I weird for doing this?

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after i take a poop i stand up turn around and piss on my poop to try to split it in half

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I have autofocus in my eyes.

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When I see a pregnant woman I can't help but think "she had sex"

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You see someone do something cool and imagine doing it in front of all your friends

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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worry about getting a little butt sweat mark on a chair if you've been sitting in it too long while its hot.

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When you're scared of the bathroom and you close your eyes you quickly look around to check if there's a monster or something in the mirror

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I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.