Pretending there is a man running beside you during a long car journey and jumping over obstacles

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expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

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Put the porn sound in a really low volume even when you have headphones, just to make sure noone can hear it. Then take off the headphones once in a while to check if it sounds too loud.

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I love the tingly feeling you get when youve shifted after realizing you arm, leg, hand, etc. has gone numb. am i the only one?

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Pay attention to commercial breaks to see if there is ever a break without an advertisement about cars or new movies coming out

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Stopping the microwave at 1 second because it's late and you don't want to be loud.

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Deside to watch a video in bed on your phone or iPad and drop it on your face...

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When well dressed, someone ask me what I do for a living, I say nothing and watch the confused look come over their face.

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So has anyone else ever been in the middle of doing something and at the exact moment something happens and you sort of wonder if it happened because of what you did.

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When I see a pregnant woman I can't help but think "she had sex"

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When you don't have enough money for something, you just take a tiny bit of money from your siblings and parents room at a time so they don't notice any different

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Sometimes I wonder how food tastes when not drowned in ketchup.

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I blow my nose in my towel after i dry off. Then use the same towel the next day. lol

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When I was little I used to cover myself all the way up and put pillows around me, then ask my sister if she could see me, trying to be invisible when I sleep just in case someone breaks into my house at night.

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right after I turn the shower off I jump up and down to get rid of the extra water all over me...

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When theres a car just like yours right next to your car in the parking lot you almoat always gravitate to that car instead. It's the worst when there people in the car and you keep trying to open it.

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Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

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Sometimes I have something I want to do and then walk into the room to do it in and forget exactly what I was trying to do, it usually involves the kitchen so I just look in the refrigerator then leave and then remember what it is I wanted to do.

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I scratch and sniff.

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thinking "what if people can read my mind" then cant stop thinking dirty things about people around me

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Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

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Smoking in the shower.

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After reading something from this site, I find myself compelled to try it.

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I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.