I take a poop and then stand up to pee because I'm a man

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Stab myself on a daily basis

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Think that some minutes feel shorter than others

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Tryng to run away from, or at least be faster than my shadow.

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Put the towel near the shower so that you can stand on it and not get the floor wet

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Pull your headphones away from your ear when you're listening to music to see if it's too loud.

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Sometimes I turn on my bedroom fan at night just so i can use heavier blankets.

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Smoking in the shower.

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Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

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I get really annoyed by the constant audience laughter in some tv shows even when nothing funny is said

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I'm a man. When I'm watching a movie with my wife and it has a sad ending. I allways have to cry but moments before the actual end has come I allready start to snif my nose so that she thinks I have a cold and do not have to cry about the ending of the movie.

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expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

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Show all your friends this website to prove your not as strange as they think you are.

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Somethings thinking: O God, I love this world.

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I love the tingly feeling you get when youve shifted after realizing you arm, leg, hand, etc. has gone numb. am i the only one?

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Picking my nose.

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I ship Bolin and Korra as a romance and a bromance. Am I weird for doing this?

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read on youtube comments with too unlikes

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I wonder what a baby is laughing about when they are apparently being entertained by something in the room I can't see

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Drink out the carton (your whole family prob does it)

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judge a spider on it's ability to hide from me and decide to let it survive if I consider it a clever hiding place, then get paranoid because the spider was smart.

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I flush the toilet if the water's green and I'm going to have a poo, so it doesn't splash me.

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HEY! YOU! Yeah you! I can speak you only, NO! Nobody else here! Yeah you only you, by the way you are a dirty piece of s**t you mothe* F**ker! YEAH ITS YOU! I HATE YOU! EVERYBODY HATES YOU YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU! *end of special message just for you*

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Sometimes I wonder how food tastes when not drowned in ketchup.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.