Pretending there is a man running beside you during a long car journey and jumping over obstacles

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fap

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getting excited when you find a recycled tissue in your robe/sweatshirt so you don't know have to get up to get one yourself?

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I twerk in the mirror to see how much my ass jiggles

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Having to poop in a certain way to avoid your ass sucking it in again. If it all comes out in one go, the cleaning becomes a lot easier and more satisfying.

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When I watch porn, I only watch like the first 5-10 minutes of it. To be honest I wonder why people bother making them longer too.

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What do you call a rapist in your house? Your father.

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If someone high fives me on one hand, I need to high five the other one too, or I feel uneven.

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Flush the toilet before you finish peeing.

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right after I turn the shower off I jump up and down to get rid of the extra water all over me...

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Wipe the salt off your hand on your right pant leg after eating salty fries from fast food restaurants.

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Spend ages searching for a porno (normally about 40 minutes), search through it for the best bit, finish and think "what was the point of all that"

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I DO wish I had the ability of the guy in the comment below me. Moral: Yeah I have to type moral down here, because its awesome and because whatever its awesome!

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I cant ride a bike

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The power to put a pointless super power on thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com

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Looking at something suggestive on your computer and worrying that someone else in your family can see what you're doing on their computer.

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Go outside to meet a friend but he cancelled so you stay in your garage so your parents don't know you're there

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Wipe a soda can after somebody else in my family drinks out of it just in case I get sick or I may feel there spit.

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Thinking about a situation someone else in the world might be in. For example, Someone dying and the pain they must be going through.

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i try to spit onto my line of piss while going to the toilet.

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Thinking that out there, on this earth in a lost city, there is an awesome clone of you.

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Be best friends with someone and tell them all your secrets and then they become best friends with someone else and you hope they won't tell your secrets

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in burgers, you eat until you have only a few bites left, then you eat the bun and then the insides

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Criticize a porn novel for its poor use of the English language

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.