misread flashlight

thumb_up thumb_down +69

Get my belt loop caught on the door handle,

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Thinking about what you want to dream about while brushing your teeth at night.

thumb_up thumb_down -53

When I get photographed with a flash and afterwards there is that little greenish dot in my vision, I keep trying to look at it directly, although I know that it's impossible

thumb_up thumb_down +40

When in a public bathroom, flush the toilet right before your shit falls into the water, so no one will hear.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

I'm 30, but to this day I still have fantasies about rescuing the girl that I'm secretly in love with from a dangerous situation. The fantasies get increasingly ridiculous, sometimes they even involve superhero stuff. It's as if my own mind was trying to let me know that I should grow the f*** up.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

tell everyone that you think that mcdonalds is unhealthy and that you think there food is nasty but in reality you actually love it.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Constantly check your post on here to see if other people give it a response.

thumb_up thumb_down -88

i eat choclate buns on easter for breakfast lunch and dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down -94

When taking trash up to the street, I always runback as fast as I can, counting down from 5, pretending there's a sniper about to shoot me.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

When I'm stressed, I pick at the skin on my head and pull white flakes out of my hair. There's nothing more satisfying to me than that.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

While I am busy working I like to have music playing and while I type I type to the song and its beat

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Tried to stuff yourself in the fridge

thumb_up thumb_down -51

Think that the shirts and bras that the girl you like should have never ben invented for that one specific person

thumb_up thumb_down -85

Forgets something then walks into the room to get it then forgets what you forgot nikki

thumb_up thumb_down +54

When walking down a long hallway with someone else at the end, becoming self conscious that your eyes are watering up

thumb_up thumb_down +44

when I need to do a number 2 in a public toilet I put toilet paper in there first so my neighbours cant hear it.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

losing something in the house, looking for it and then for some reason if I can't find it, I look in all the same places again

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Get turned on lookin at my own butt

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Think about blinking, and then realize that when you think about blinking, you can't stop thinking about blinking, and thus a 3-4 minute awkward blinking-fest begins.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Put on different accents, ad talk to my self in the mirror.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

I always leave a little coffee in the pot so that it becomes someone elses problem

thumb_up thumb_down -21

after doing the dishes i get my hands wet after putting my jumper on cause i failed 2 dry my hands propley my arms a f***** cold dammit!!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

wipe the bottle lid before i drink because i dont whant to taste what the other person had in there mouth...

thumb_up thumb_down -55

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.