Wait 2-3 seconds with anticipation whenever a baby falls for them to cry.

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Inspect the mirrors in store changing rooms in case they are one-way glass. Make faces into mirror as if you know they're back there.

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I read your stuff at the interwebs and think "sons, I am disappoint" Moral: Lol, I just might be your father you know... But that does not mean you disappoint me anymore, I kinda expect your worst? Best? I mean... Are you doing your worst on purpose? WOW!

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Having cool food in your house and knowing your boyfriend is going to call you around 6 or so, so you start eating said awesome food at about 5:57. That way when your boyfriend asks what you're doing to can tell him you're eating _____ and he'll want to come over.

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Get annoyed when you are making a new account and it sends you bafk because of credit card or email address

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I wipe the part of the glass or water bottle i drink from

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Seeing a cartoon character eat something makes me hungry for it even though it may not taste good in real life and I know that.

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Everytime I get in my car at night, I turn the light on and check behind the back seats to see if there's anyone waiting for me. Then lock the doors when all is safe.

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I really like taking shits.

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I pee in the water of the toilet to make bubbles

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I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

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scream after your in the ooh part of achooh when you sneeze.

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Only taking half a biscuit because it makes you feel bad and then taking another half of a different biscuit.

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Think about past screw ups, then cross my eyes thinking to myself "I'm such a F---ing retard."

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When I'm scared in the shower sing

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When I have a bottle in my hand and nothing to do in class. I read the nutrition facts and ingredients 2 to 4 times until the teacher says something.

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I'm paranoid of EVERYTHING. When I enter a room, I inspect it for cameras. When I'm in the bathroom I cover all the cameras on my iPod, Phone, etc. When I do something I'm not supposed to do on the computer (such as download music for free), I cover the webcam to assure the government can't see me. I control my thoughts 24/7 at fear that someone will read my thoughts. I have a strict feeling the someone is always watching me. I fear subliminal advertisements also. To sum everything up you could just read the first part. I DONT TRUST ANYTHING OR ANYONE! I'm Not sure if anyone else is as paranoid as I am...

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imagine squeezing your bladder in your hand when your peeing.

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I try to accomplish things while waiting for the timer on the microwave can go off.

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wonder if anyone's watching you and try to seem like a decent person

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When I watch porn,I sometimes pause the video and start looking something random. e.g. an unrelated article on Wikipedia.

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Write things on this site, because i cant sleep

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Go outside and pee.

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I precisley fold toilet paper , so that I can unfold it and use the other side

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.