get bored so I fist myself for money

wonder if anyone's watching you and try to seem like a decent person

Think about past screw ups, then cross my eyes thinking to myself "I'm such a F---ing retard."

I repeat (in my mind) the person's name that I want to dream about when I go to sleep

"I'll start tomorrow..." wake up and it has been a year later and I still haven't done it.

Any time I hear someone speaking with an accent, I start mimicking that accident. –Ikka

Wait 2-3 seconds with anticipation whenever a baby falls for them to cry.

When talking to someone you sometimes start with the middle of a story through the end, complete with random details that seem totally unrelated to them, and THEN you remember to tell the beginning (which is the part that actually relates to what they were talking about).

Think you're breathing way too loud when your headphones are turned up

Sing really loudly and think you hear someone come in. yell "hello" for five minutes before singing again.

I precisley fold toilet paper , so that I can unfold it and use the other side

in my mind prisms are called pink floyd.

Clenching your teeth subconsciously, then wondering why your teeth hurt so much afterwards.

Making "X's" with your fingernail on bug bites to get rid of them.

Love an outfit on others/mannequin, but hate it on me!

Checking your phone for a text when you know you don't have one. Matt

I click that I have read the Terms of Service although I haven't read sheit

sit on the toilet when taking a crap and play my iPod or laptop at the same time for something to do.

After watching a movie, always walk out the theatre feeling like a total bad ass

I always open up another tab on my browser, just in case I accidentally exit, so my computer can warn me that I will close 2 tabs.

Think of the best come-backs ever, a few seconds after the time to use them would be.

blow nose. look at kleenex.

I like to poo while smoking.

Go outside and pee.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.