Dutch oven myself when I'm lying in bed trying to sleep

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Imagine flying things and epic battles when listening to music.

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Criticize a porn novel for its poor use of the English language

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I get more creeped out the more I read the comments here, especially as the comments start getting really low thumbs ups.

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Taking your headphones/earbuds off a lot to see if your music is playing loudly. Or to see if other people could possibly hear it

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I randomly hold my boobs in my room.

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when sleeping over at someone's house, make a cringing, weird looking face while opening the fridge in the middle of the night like somehow the look on your face will change the volume of the seal breaking open

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When I wake up after having a good dream I try to remember it but I don't

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wipe all the water off my body (predrying myself) before i get out of the shower, and dry myself with the towel

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Change the channel when a Progressive commercial comes on because I can't STAND that stupid Flo girl.

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When ever i hear music that i like i imagine im in a fight and i know martial arts with people i dont know

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get a new *to you* car, and suddenly every other car on the road is the same make/ model..... hey look! an outback!

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I probably am the only one who does this but I climb on my cat's cat tree to see what it's like to be a cat o.o

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Stop singing about weed when you see a cop car.

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I asked telemarketers for their home number so I can call them at home and disturb THEM while they're relaxing with THEIR family

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Stop at the beginning of an escalator, and let the stairs drag you forward by just your toes.

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Try to find the perfect stride length so you don't have to walk all weird to avoid stepping on a sidewalk crack. Fail miserably but keep walking weird.

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When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

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feel like im being watched turn my head sideways and see someone suddenly look away.

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I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

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Turn the door knob while closing the door ...so it doesn't make a loud noise.

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When you're chatting with a friend while you're walking around and not really paying attention then you turn around to took at your friend and you realise you've been talking to someone you don't even know the entire time.

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Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

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get a really delicious smelling soap or candle and feel sad when you remember you can't eat it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.