I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

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Layer the water in the toilet with toilet paper, so when I poo the water does splash back up and splatter poo and water all over my bum

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Sometimes I wonder why I smell even though I remember putting DO on. I become embarrassed because there is a girl next to me. I hope she cannot smell it. Finally I realize its not me. It's her.

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When you're scared of the bathroom and you close your eyes you quickly look around to check if there's a monster or something in the mirror

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Wait until my friends are done eating lunch so I don't have to dump my tray alone.

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When your watching a YouTube video and you have to watch an AD, you mute it and turn your head away because your just that pissed off at the company.

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While at the movies, grab and eat your popcorn with your tongue and pretend you are a lizard.

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Flush the toilet before you finish peeing.

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masturbate as soon as the opportunity arrises. "You'll be home alone all day" "Ok, bye.....*fap fap fap*"

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Get somewhat worried about myself if I'm thumbed down on THIS SITE.

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dip my fries in ice cream! sometimes in soda. It's good!

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Hate when people ask "do you have a bathroom?" It's like "no we crap in the yard!"

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While I Am on the computer late at night, my Mum tells me to go to bed, I say I will in a second. I stay for a few more minutes, my mum tells me again, I do the same thing...

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get happy as sh*t when you remember your homework is do after your lunch period so you can do it then, but never end up doing it.

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always get sports injuries, never get any attention from them

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Getting over excited when you hear a song you like on the radio, even though you have it on your Ipod and can listen to it whenever you want.

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i absolutely hate the number nine, and when i told my brother this i was like "sometimes i wish i could delete the number 9" and hes like "but then youd have 9 numbers" and i was like..... "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"

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Spend ages searching for a porno (normally about 40 minutes), search through it for the best bit, finish and think "what was the point of all that"

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Pull your headphones away from your ear when you're listening to music to see if it's too loud.

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My login password is INCORRECT so if I forget it my computer will say "your password is incorrect"

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When im alone in my car i talk to myself about lifes issues

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I try to not step on the lines on the sidewalk

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I DO wish I had the ability of the guy in the comment below me. Moral: Yeah I have to type moral down here, because its awesome and because whatever its awesome!

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Sometimes, for no real reason, I'll make strange or funny noises when no one is around.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.