Whenever people dare accuse me of being too full off myself I tell them. Moral: I cant get to full of myself, the more me, the less you, ALL THE BETTER FOR EVERYONE! WE ARE VICTORY! (except you)

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cringe when I squeeze a cotton ball, ugh

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Have a fantasy where Jesus Christ is jackhammering Mickey Mouse in the doo-doo hole with a lawn dart while Garth Brooks gives birth to something resembling a cheddar cheese log with almonds on Santa Claus's tummy-tum.

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I pick my nose n eat it. I love the hard ones

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When a lot if people are yelling at me / disagreeing with me all at once, I start laughing.

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when im on my phone in bed my phone always falls on my face -.-

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Reherse jokes/phrases to say to friends in school tomorrow

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I plan to put money away everyday but never seem to do it.

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feel that the horsehead network captchas can read my mind. kind of scary.

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When I climb into bed every night, I always say, "Bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed," while shifting until I am comfortablely settled. -Ikka

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I look at my phone screen when i'm in an uncomfortable situation, and five minutes later i have to look again cause somebody asks what time it is.

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You imagine your future self visiting you and tell you about your life.

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A stranger makes me mad. Spend all day thinking about badass things that I should have done/said.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Sleep with one leg on top of the covers and the rest of your body under them.

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After I flush the toilet, I run out of the bathroom really fast.

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If someone asks me if I want something and they get up to get it and im sitting down, I say " oh I can get it" eventhough they are already up just to not seem like a lazy piece of shit

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Drinking and dialing people I dated.

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use my phone as an alarm clock for waking up. but sets the time in PM instead of AM.

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When I'm doing a spelling test, I spell a word and read it over and over again until it loses its meaning.

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When i wake up from a good dream, i close my eyes and imagine the ending in different ways.

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Type in 'things you thought only you did' and find this site. Then smile stupidly and click thumbs up everytime you read something you thought only you did.

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Whenever your going down a flight of stairs with two rails, hold the two rails and go from the top step to the bottom.

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Turn on the faucet and/or fan when using the toilet at someone else's house or at my own place when there is a visitor because I don't want them to hear me peeing.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.