Have a fantasy where Jesus Christ is jackhammering Mickey Mouse in the doo-doo hole with a lawn dart while Garth Brooks gives birth to something resembling a cheddar cheese log with almonds on Santa Claus's tummy-tum.

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When peeing, if I get pee on the seat I will flush the toilet before wiping it and then see if I can quickly wipe it and toss the toilet paper in the toilet before it finishes flushing.

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Clicking Yes to "I have read and agree to the Terms of Service" without reading one word of that stupid thing.

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When watching a heavy action movie and you suddenly start thinking about how much it would cost to repair the damages made in the movie.

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Hate Skydoesminecraft.

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pleasure my self... because I didn't they automatically censored certain words

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Own all of you hard! Moral: EXPLOSION NOISE!

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When telemarketers call I speak Afrikaans to them until they hang up

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when i was a kid, i lookup dirty words in the english dictionary as substitute for porn :(

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When I'm doing a spelling test, I spell a word and read it over and over again until it loses its meaning.

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When I forget to brush my teeth, scrape off the plaque on my teeth with my fingernail.

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Instead of having a nasty breaking up, I just disappear.

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Say a word I just learned over and over again until it loses meaning.

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I'm so afraid of using words incorrectly that I look up any word I'm not sure that I'm using properly before typing it into wherever I'll use it. If the definition is too vague, I abandon the word and try something else.

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Saying or doing something stupid, then later replaying it in your head and wanting to punch yourself in the face for it, then coming up with different ideas on how you could have been less stupid. -B

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You laugh to yourself when you think you are alone in a street but then you notice somebody in a car looking at you.

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act like people from movies or shows just because my life is that boring

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Ask someone "what" when they tell you something even though you heard them clearly

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wonder how old the people r who right these. im 12

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I eat ice creams from the bottom of the cone to the top.

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I ejaculate fire and glory

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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being a mid-teenager, never having a relationship before and don't care at all.

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I very carefully smell what I'm about to eat before I eat it, but I'd most likely eat it, even if I hadn't smelled it first.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.