When I have a good dream I can't remember it the day after, but I can remember another dream I had a year ago.

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use cleverbot to chat to automated dating chat bots. even if i don't understand swedish.

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When I fart I immediately go 'Eww. Who farted? That's gross'. And I blame it on someone else, always works :)

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I walk down the stairs sideways because I'm afraid something will get me.

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Eat or drink something tpretending it's some sort of fuel that'll give you powers.

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I pick my nose n eat it. I love the hard ones

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hold my shirt with my chin when i'm peeing.

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Ask someone "what" when they tell you something even though you heard them clearly

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I plan to put money away everyday but never seem to do it.

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kick something under the fridge that you dont want to pick up

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Get creeped out at seeing 11:34 at least once per day. The number even turns up everywhere in my life such as my jewelry store.

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Pee extra hard in a urinal when there's someone else in the bathroom so you don't seem weak

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FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAPFAP FAP ::TROLLFACE::

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Don't have to poop for a week until I get in the shower

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I very carefully smell what I'm about to eat before I eat it, but I'd most likely eat it, even if I hadn't smelled it first.

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Sometimes I just space out for a period of time and completely forget that I'm breathing. Then when I snap out of it, I kind of breathe deeply because I thought I forgot to breathe.

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act like people from movies or shows just because my life is that boring

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Whenever I slurp from a straw I do it a little bit at a time, slowly and steadily so people don't turn at me and give me an annoyed face.

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Whenever I switch sides on my bed, I feel like when I turn around some scary clown face is going to be RIGHT THERE in my face

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After I flush the toilet, I run out of the bathroom really fast.

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When telemarketers call I speak Afrikaans to them until they hang up

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Own all of you hard! Moral: EXPLOSION NOISE!

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Randomly flexing random muscles after long time of sitting at the computer

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I trap my farts under the covers and sniff them all up or cup them in my hand and sniff real hard to get the smell.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.