After eating a lot of junk food begin to fear that i'm going to get diabetes.

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get bored so I fist myself for money

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I make it sound like i'm ordering for more than one person when I'm really only getting fast food for myself.

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I always open up another tab on my browser, just in case I accidentally exit, so my computer can warn me that I will close 2 tabs.

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wonder if anyone's watching you and try to seem like a decent person

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When talking to someone you sometimes start with the middle of a story through the end, complete with random details that seem totally unrelated to them, and THEN you remember to tell the beginning (which is the part that actually relates to what they were talking about).

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Become paranoid that this is not the real world, and instead is some coma induced dream.

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getting a random wedgie when everybody is looking at me

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apparently you turn or twist everything to tight like a sink or a bottlecap ect. "i cant open the bottle of fu***ng coke becase you "

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sit on the toilet when taking a crap and play my iPod or laptop at the same time for something to do.

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I precisley fold toilet paper , so that I can unfold it and use the other side

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Checking your phone for a text when you know you don't have one. Matt

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Find something on this site that you actually do not do, and think how weird the person who wrote that must be.

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Clenching your teeth subconsciously, then wondering why your teeth hurt so much afterwards.

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if someone i like or want to impress is around i change the song I'm listening to to something that i know they like or something not embarrassing, just in case they ask me what i'm listening to.

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After watching a movie, always walk out the theatre feeling like a total bad ass

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Sing really loudly and think you hear someone come in. yell "hello" for five minutes before singing again.

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Think of the best come-backs ever, a few seconds after the time to use them would be.

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Making "X's" with your fingernail on bug bites to get rid of them.

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Any time I hear someone speaking with an accent, I start mimicking that accident. –Ikka

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Love an outfit on others/mannequin, but hate it on me!

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When I'm scared in the shower sing

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when going to get a drink, i accidently pull out a bowl, or plate, later realizing what i did, i put it back, and get a cup

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When I go to the bathroom I put toilet paper over my penis and pretend its a ghost

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.