When you were in elementary school you thought people laughed at Uranus because it sounds kinda like urine and then wondered why it was so funny; the two only sound remotely alike.

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sometimes I get so bored watching tv that I have an incredible urge to throw the remote at the tv. I would never do it, but I always fear I might and break the tv.

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Think of numbers as male or female.

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When on a boring car ride, add up all the numbers on the licence plates I see.

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Wanting something so much. Getting it then wondering what to do next

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Sweep up the dirt into the dustpan and sweep the stuff you can't get under the cabinet.

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Music is ALWAYS playing in my head. I can't go a day without noticing that the whole time a song is just burned in my brain, playing over and over. Is this okay? Im pretty sure im the only one...

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clean specks of sh*t in the toilet by peeing on it.

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When making something I pretend I'm making a YouTube video of it

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When you're all alone, practice for an interview you're bound to have when you're rich and famous and say other people's responses when they are asked about working with you.

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I keep thinking a thing is about to fall from the table even though it's not close to the edge

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I'm starting to ignore Hollywood, the news and experts opinions more and more.

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When I'm about to fart, I close my butthole with cupped hand to smell my own fart. Sometimes after I fart, I bend down just to smell the scent.

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when liking something you like or dislike something you click it twice even though you know it will only take one vote

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Promise to save money then spends all of it anyway.

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Not answer a question or something of the sort Evan if you know you know the answer because you are paranoid that you are wrong.

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oh snap, i got a boner. hope nobody notices

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Shake my hands frantically back and forth when watching the microwave count down or the printer print, as if it will make them go faster.

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When I'm waiting for someone who is late. I go-over in my head how I'm going to greet them. For example "Well, it's about damn time", or "Finally!".

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Things I did when I was little: Slowly close the fridge door to see the light go out before it is closed all of the way. Put the light switch in between "OFF" and "ON". Walked in to a room and forgot why, walked out then remembered. (STILL DO!) Drew the sun in the corner of the paper. Put a flashlight in your mouth to see yourself, "blush".

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I find it really hard to not respond a insulting youtube comment with a hopefully even bigger insult.

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After using the restroom at someone's house I turn on the water and proceed to check myself in the mirror while the water runs and sounds like I'm washing my hands then I turn off the water and walk out.

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When I see something on facebook i dont like, I like it just so i can unlike it.

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Sometimes when it's very windy, i Loudly yell "Stop". The Wind most often seem to lower it's intensity or completely blow off.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.