Create my response for the whole conversation before even having it

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run up the stairs when its night so that the monsters dont catch you

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Get annoyed when you are making a new account and it sends you bafk because of credit card or email address

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I have a cat that drops on it's side when she sees me coming

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Fart when i'm alone RIGHT before someone walks in... try to talk over the smell...

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Whenever I'm throwing trash down the garbage chute or into a dumpster, I all of the sudden am terrified that I accidentally threw out a valuable ring/my cell phone with the trash.

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I read your stuff at the interwebs and think "sons, I am disappoint" Moral: Lol, I just might be your father you know... But that does not mean you disappoint me anymore, I kinda expect your worst? Best? I mean... Are you doing your worst on purpose? WOW!

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Spray my perfume under my arms so if I sweat then it smells like perfume.

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I am wearing ear buds even though I'm not actually listening to anything.

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When changing the volume one my computer it has to be a multiple of 2

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When I have a bottle in my hand and nothing to do in class. I read the nutrition facts and ingredients 2 to 4 times until the teacher says something.

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Skip peeing before bed because you dont feel like it, knowing that in about 15 minutes youre going to have to get back up because you wont be able to fall asleep until you go pee.

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If someone asks me if I want something and they get up to get it and im sitting down, I say " oh I can get it" eventhough they are already up just to not seem like a lazy piece of shit

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in my mind prisms are called pink floyd.

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(2) When listening to someone I maintain eye contact, but don't actually hear a word they say, just thinking about the eye contact...

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When I have a good dream I can't remember it the day after, but I can remember another dream I had a year ago.

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Press the Microwave open button at 0:01 to feel like you defused a bomb and avoided that stupid beeping.

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wonder if anyone's watching you and try to seem like a decent person

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I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

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Inspect the mirrors in store changing rooms in case they are one-way glass. Make faces into mirror as if you know they're back there.

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Only taking half a biscuit because it makes you feel bad and then taking another half of a different biscuit.

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Open Fridge, look around for few seconds, say to self - 'What the f*** am I doing?'

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When I wanted to sit on chair or anything, I'll wipe them first, in case there is something sticked on them

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After watching a movie, always walk out the theatre feeling like a total bad ass

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.