When talking to someone you sometimes start with the middle of a story through the end, complete with random details that seem totally unrelated to them, and THEN you remember to tell the beginning (which is the part that actually relates to what they were talking about).

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Spray my perfume under my arms so if I sweat then it smells like perfume.

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Fart when i'm alone RIGHT before someone walks in... try to talk over the smell...

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When I fart I immediately go 'Eww. Who farted? That's gross'. And I blame it on someone else, always works :)

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I get angry when people use question marks where they don't belong. QUESTION marks are for QUESTIONS. Not statements or opinions >:( "But whatever I don't care I mean that's your opinion?" X FFFUU- "But whatever I don't care I mean that's your opinion." ?

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Making "X's" with your fingernail on bug bites to get rid of them.

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try to cut corners in my house and hit the wall

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Think about awesome stuff that you could do (e.g beating up someone who steals your gf's purse or something) when listening to music

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when going to get a drink, i accidently pull out a bowl, or plate, later realizing what i did, i put it back, and get a cup

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I ejaculate fire and glory

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Opens new book to random page. Reads snippet. Smiles to myself when I reach it 1 week later. -epsin

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Close my eyes and squeeze them so I can see colorful stars and galaxies.

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Think that everything has feelings for example, a cushion or a tree

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get scarred shit less when some one burst though your door when it tacky

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I'm paranoid of EVERYTHING. When I enter a room, I inspect it for cameras. When I'm in the bathroom I cover all the cameras on my iPod, Phone, etc. When I do something I'm not supposed to do on the computer (such as download music for free), I cover the webcam to assure the government can't see me. I control my thoughts 24/7 at fear that someone will read my thoughts. I have a strict feeling the someone is always watching me. I fear subliminal advertisements also. To sum everything up you could just read the first part. I DONT TRUST ANYTHING OR ANYONE! I'm Not sure if anyone else is as paranoid as I am...

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Create my response for the whole conversation before even having it

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Don't have to poop for a week until I get in the shower

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Get annoyed when you are making a new account and it sends you bafk because of credit card or email address

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I have an irrational fear of automatic flushing toilets.

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go to the bathroom, turn on the hot water, get undressed so that the water has time to heat up

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Go outside and pee.

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When I wanted to sit on chair or anything, I'll wipe them first, in case there is something sticked on them

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FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAPFAP FAP ::TROLLFACE::

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wonder if anyone's watching you and try to seem like a decent person

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.