Don't have to poop for a week until I get in the shower

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Tape your dick to your leg to fit into tight pants

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Contract my gluteus maximus while sitting for a long time to feel more comfortable.

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Walking down stairs. Accidently miss last step. Feel like you're going to die.

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Wally,you mean Obamney is the only choice?

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popping the lenses out of 3D glasses and wearing them when your doing homework or studying because it makes you feel smarter.

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Think about awesome stuff that you could do (e.g beating up someone who steals your gf's purse or something) when listening to music

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Write things on this site, because i cant sleep

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Think that everything has feelings for example, a cushion or a tree

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Whatever situation I am in, I always start to invent rhythms with everything i have around, e.g. my legs, voice, tables or sometimes even the ground.

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I wipe the part of the glass or water bottle i drink from

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apparently you turn or twist everything to tight like a sink or a bottlecap ect. "i cant open the bottle of fu***ng coke becase you "

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I really like taking shits.

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When I eat M&Ms, Skittles or Froot Loops, I always make sure to leave one of every color for the end so I could eat them all at once. #rainbowinmymouth

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go to the bathroom, turn on the hot water, get undressed so that the water has time to heat up

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Having cool food in your house and knowing your boyfriend is going to call you around 6 or so, so you start eating said awesome food at about 5:57. That way when your boyfriend asks what you're doing to can tell him you're eating _____ and he'll want to come over.

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pleasure my self... because I didn't they automatically censored certain words

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Leave the television on in my room when I go to bed, so I have some light and I can't hear all the creepy sounds that houses make.

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Create my response for the whole conversation before even having it

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hate it when the bottom of you foot is itchy because it feels wrong to scratch it.

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When in long car rides I imagine a little man running or on roller skates next to the car. When A car comes he turns into a ninja and can slide under/jump over or cut the car in half.

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When I'm scared in the shower sing

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Close my eyes and squeeze them so I can see colorful stars and galaxies.

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wonder if anyone's watching you and try to seem like a decent person

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.