pleasure my self... because I didn't they automatically censored certain words

When I go to the bathroom I put toilet paper over my penis and pretend its a ghost

Create my response for the whole conversation before even having it

get scarred shit less when some one burst though your door when it tacky

I have an irrational fear of automatic flushing toilets.

whenever I come across a website like this, I try to read through every post as fast as I can. When I reach the end, I feel like I accomplished something but sad I have no more to read.

I get angry when people use question marks where they don't belong. QUESTION marks are for QUESTIONS. Not statements or opinions >:( "But whatever I don't care I mean that's your opinion?" X FFFUU- "But whatever I don't care I mean that's your opinion." ?

Don't have to poop for a week until I get in the shower

Contract my gluteus maximus while sitting for a long time to feel more comfortable.

Think about awesome stuff that you could do (e.g beating up someone who steals your gf's purse or something) when listening to music

Making "X's" with your fingernail on bug bites to get rid of them.

when going to get a drink, i accidently pull out a bowl, or plate, later realizing what i did, i put it back, and get a cup

Become paranoid that this is not the real world, and instead is some coma induced dream.

Get annoyed when you are making a new account and it sends you bafk because of credit card or email address

Opens new book to random page. Reads snippet. Smiles to myself when I reach it 1 week later. -epsin

Fart when i'm alone RIGHT before someone walks in... try to talk over the smell...

Leave the television on in my room when I go to bed, so I have some light and I can't hear all the creepy sounds that houses make.

Think that everything has feelings for example, a cushion or a tree

try to cut corners in my house and hit the wall

When I fart I immediately go 'Eww. Who farted? That's gross'. And I blame it on someone else, always works :)

Wally,you mean Obamney is the only choice?

FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAPFAP FAP ::TROLLFACE::

apparently you turn or twist everything to tight like a sink or a bottlecap ect. "i cant open the bottle of fu***ng coke becase you "

blow nose. look at kleenex.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.