Spray my perfume under my arms so if I sweat then it smells like perfume.

thumb_up thumb_down -108

Contract my gluteus maximus while sitting for a long time to feel more comfortable.

thumb_up thumb_down -126

Fart when i'm alone RIGHT before someone walks in... try to talk over the smell...

thumb_up thumb_down +23

whenever I come across a website like this, I try to read through every post as fast as I can. When I reach the end, I feel like I accomplished something but sad I have no more to read.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Purposely save one piece of homework untill Sunday night in case you want to get out of doing something boring.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

When I fart I immediately go 'Eww. Who farted? That's gross'. And I blame it on someone else, always works :)

thumb_up thumb_down +3

when going to get a drink, i accidently pull out a bowl, or plate, later realizing what i did, i put it back, and get a cup

thumb_up thumb_down -29

pleasure my self... because I didn't they automatically censored certain words

thumb_up thumb_down -67

FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP FAPFAP FAP ::TROLLFACE::

thumb_up thumb_down -85

When I watch porn,I sometimes pause the video and start looking something random. e.g. an unrelated article on Wikipedia.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Don't have to poop for a week until I get in the shower

thumb_up thumb_down -82

try to cut corners in my house and hit the wall

thumb_up thumb_down -116

Opens new book to random page. Reads snippet. Smiles to myself when I reach it 1 week later. -epsin

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Everytime I get in my car at night, I turn the light on and check behind the back seats to see if there's anyone waiting for me. Then lock the doors when all is safe.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Laughing at a joke that you dont think is funny but everybody else does

thumb_up thumb_down -22

I really like taking shits.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

After watching a movie, always walk out the theatre feeling like a total bad ass

thumb_up thumb_down -60

I have an irrational fear of automatic flushing toilets.

thumb_up thumb_down +69

When I wanted to sit on chair or anything, I'll wipe them first, in case there is something sticked on them

thumb_up thumb_down -25

wonder if anyone's watching you and try to seem like a decent person

thumb_up thumb_down -33

I ejaculate fire and glory

thumb_up thumb_down -55

Get annoyed when you are making a new account and it sends you bafk because of credit card or email address

thumb_up thumb_down -111

I Repeat my coincidental happenings..and say please don't do(x5)..

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Making "X's" with your fingernail on bug bites to get rid of them.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.