If im eating food i shouldnt and i dont want anybody to know i jump if anyone comes in and catches me.

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When I'm trying to sleep and my mind's like, "Hey, know what's a good movie? Paranormal Activity!" Then I can't sleep for an hour - Brayden Everes

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At night when alone in my bed...I sometimes pretend like I got hit by a car or something, and my loved one is there with me...and I act out my last words...and how I would act. I've done this occasionally since I was 5. With different scenario's. Schmee

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I don't cut a conversation on the phone short just because I have to use the "facilities". I've mastered the art of being as far away from the toilet while flushing and sprinting out of the bathroom.

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Shake my hands frantically back and forth when watching the microwave count down or the printer print, as if it will make them go faster.

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Have to suddenly poop while shopping (mainly in Wal-Mart), but don't feel like traveling far to the restroom. So I kneel down in whatever aisle I'm in, casually shove my heel up my butt, and pick up some random item from the shelf and pretend to be interested in it. Finally, when the poop is secure in my butt, I'll put the item back and continue my shopping.

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Get angry at someone for not knowing something I haven't told them about.

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I keep thinking a thing is about to fall from the table even though it's not close to the edge

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smoke marijuana

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I avoid my wealthy but cool relatives because I don't want them to think I want money

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Try to think of as many as my female friends as literally possible while masturbating. Rapid Fire envisioning each one I can think of - regardless of their attractiveness - taking my load in one place or another, until I actually cum.

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Still can't walk on cracks. If I step on the crack with one foot, the other has to as well.

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Download a new app, and say to myself I'll never stop playing it. Play it for 2 hours and forget about it.

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when u were younger and closed the fridge door super slowly 2 c when the light turned off

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Thinking that someone is seeing everything from your eyes while you are using the bathroom, and then quickly looking up to avoid embarassment.

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After you wipe your butt and crotch with a towel, you dont want the towel to touch your face. Next night, dry your face and head first.

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jack off

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hearing the opening theme music to Disney or 20th Century Fox or whatever and knowing what it is before you see the screen, then wondering if you should feel proud or if your a weird geek.

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I never let anything go over the toilet when It's open.

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Okay so probably like everyone else, when Schapelle Corby was found with drugs on her in bali I thought she was innocent but now since she was let out of the prison I am wondering if she did do it?

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When I aak someone out it takes me 3-6 attempts to get the words out

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i don't have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

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when i m in a car i'll look at the letters on license plates and try to think of words that you can make-or almost make- with those letters

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I read your stuff at the interwebs and think "sons, I am disappoint" Moral: Lol, I just might be your father you know... But that does not mean you disappoint me anymore, I kinda expect your worst? Best? I mean... Are you doing your worst on purpose? WOW!

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.