When you were in elementary school you thought people laughed at Uranus because it sounds kinda like urine and then wondered why it was so funny; the two only sound remotely alike.

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When im going from one room to the next, i try and get into the other room before the door to the last room closes. If i do, I've won.

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hug the pillow at night so it protects me from monsters

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Takes playful flirting way to seriouse.

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Get angry at someone for not knowing something I haven't told them about.

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in the morning the first thing I do is pick my nose n eat it n then I smell my discharge

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Waking up at 4 am wondering where your pillow went.

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Promise to save money then spends all of it anyway.

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Put your feet up on the wall when you can't get to sleep

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Not answer a question or something of the sort Evan if you know you know the answer because you are paranoid that you are wrong.

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I laugh easier when im with someone

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I count how many steps it takes to cross a section of sidewalk, and will continue taking the same amount of steps until I realize it.

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Wait until there is nobody in the bathroom and then fart really really loud. Also I flip my pillow every 10 minutes so my head is on the cold side. (try it some time)

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that movie-like moment when you want to rush out to dance in the rain

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I used to do almost everything an even number of times because I thought that if I didn't something bad would happen.

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Miss the bus, keep running pretending I was going somewhere else.

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I keep thinking a thing is about to fall from the table even though it's not close to the edge

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When you Sitting on the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.

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When I go to use my laptop if my cat is sleeping in my chair I would use it somewhere else and leave her alone.

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Sunday's are making me feel depressed.

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I bought a ps4 and really regret it.

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I avoid my wealthy but cool relatives because I don't want them to think I want money

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Whenever I'm doing my makeup I pretend I'm doing a makeup tutorial on Youtube.

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Fantasize about being with somebody else when I have sex

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.