When I go to use my laptop if my cat is sleeping in my chair I would use it somewhere else and leave her alone.

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Try to make a sound described in a book or text (like a gasp or a gargle)

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when liking something you like or dislike something you click it twice even though you know it will only take one vote

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Wake up, unnaturally hungry, make meal fit for a king.

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Flush the toilet right before done peeing so when you're done, the toilet and your pee has been flushed.

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when on long car rides look out the window imagineing stick figures running

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I laugh easier when im with someone

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that movie-like moment when you want to rush out to dance in the rain

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worry about your eyebrows sneaking their way up and making wrinkles on your forehead

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Fantasize about being with somebody else when I have sex

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I eat spoons of dry hot chocolate powder when nobody is around.

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When people are whispering you think they are saying bad things

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Check my underwear for any sh!t from farts (yes, sometimes my shit comes with a fart) captcha: royal flush

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Put your feet up on the wall when you can't get to sleep

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I always think I have special powers

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After you wipe your butt and crotch with a towel, you dont want the towel to touch your face. Next night, dry your face and head first.

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When I see something on facebook i dont like, I like it just so i can unlike it.

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Sunday's are making me feel depressed.

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Wearing cheap CZ rings to either stop guys hitting on me or pretend I'm engaged.

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I have an unhealthy obsession with and so always talk about Penge North Korea beige mauve and medium density fiberboard. This explains why I'm such a popular guy

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When out I like to "people watch."

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I avoid my wealthy but cool relatives because I don't want them to think I want money

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Sometimes, I ask myself philosophical questions. The one that is bugging me now is "If reincarnation is real, why is this life so vivid?"

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I find it really hard to not respond a insulting youtube comment with a hopefully even bigger insult.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.