When I'm alone, I just randomly say "I know you're there so I would look awesome if someone was actually there.

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When they say the name of the movie in the movie i get excited o.O

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Turn the light off, run, and JUMP into bed. I'm 26.

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When people are whispering you think they are saying bad things

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put a load of loo roll in the loo before taking a dump at work so it silences the landing.

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Say what even when u heard someone

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In school look at the wall or something and feel like only a few seconds has gone by but really thirty minutes has

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When i want to write a joke on anti jokes.com i laugh at my friends instead!

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worry about your eyebrows sneaking their way up and making wrinkles on your forehead

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I used to do almost everything an even number of times because I thought that if I didn't something bad would happen.

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When I aak someone out it takes me 3-6 attempts to get the words out

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Reach past the first two or three slices of bread to get the better, fresher bread towards the middle.

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Waking up at 4 am wondering where your pillow went.

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Not laughing at funny things on T.V. because nobody is around.

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I don't cut a conversation on the phone short just because I have to use the "facilities". I've mastered the art of being as far away from the toilet while flushing and sprinting out of the bathroom.

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I have never disliked any video on YouTube with not many views ( no matter how bad it is ) because I feel bad for the uploader.

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After you wipe your butt and crotch with a towel, you dont want the towel to touch your face. Next night, dry your face and head first.

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get so shitfaced you wake up in a closet with piss everywhere

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When I'm at the checkout and paying with my card, I try to put my PIN in the card machine before the cashier has a chance to tell me to do it.

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Wake up, unnaturally hungry, make meal fit for a king.

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If im eating food i shouldnt and i dont want anybody to know i jump if anyone comes in and catches me.

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Sitting next to a banana called James

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When someone sits with crossed legs, I notice their lifted foot throb slightly with their pulse. It is really distracting sometimes.

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Download a new app, and say to myself I'll never stop playing it. Play it for 2 hours and forget about it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.