Before I go to sleep, I imagine what it would be like dating a really hot actor or singer and think of dramatic scenarios that could happen.

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I daydream and consequently spend twenty minutes having a dump

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When I'm getting shouted out i blur my eyes and think of something else :3

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I like to eat grilled cheese with ketchup

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say to my friend do you ever think that someone else is thinking the same thing that they are thinking at this moment in time and then SHYT in there mouth. Normally they gurggle it in their throat, before swallowing it and making a pedo face, and sometimes i bike naked and shit on cars with diorrea so it explodes on the windows.

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Put your feet up on the wall when you can't get to sleep

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Try to pee on the toilet-paper in the toilet so it rips in half

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Read for hours... then hear a narrative for everything you do after you stop reading. for ex: "Jen gets out of the car, shutting it with a loud bang. She walks towards the house, noticing the dead squirrel in the road."

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I put big spaces in between comments

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Sunday's are making me feel depressed.

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Not being able to balance in heels because the insides are smothered in foot sweat. -_-

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Hate using public bathrooms because everyone can hear you pee.

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Force a piss out really hard because you're in a rush.

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after having a hot shower I sometimes just sit in my room wearing just a towel

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When winking, I feel as if I have to wink with the other eye to be fair to both eyes.

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Find it impossible to get rid of the itch on the bottom of my feet or my palms when they're itchy

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Pick my scabs off and then lick the blood off.

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Not expecting anyone to come over, some one knocks on the front door, mute the TV and hope they just go away.

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When I watch a movie that terrifies me, I usually find myself sitting on the sofa with a kitchen knife in my hand at the end of the movie.

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Look at restaurant signs and realize the font isnt as fancy as you once thought

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okay,So we bought a 1000 piece puzzle and made a point to put it together when it was done we found that it was missing a piece so we went back to the same store bought the same puzzle and went through it until we found the missing piece then returned it.

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get really embarrassed when i leave the book i read when i poop on the bathroom counter and someone uses the bathroom.

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Like a toy until it breaks.

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Takes playful flirting way to seriouse.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.