I type out something I think is funny, then wonder if people will think I'm weird and erase it.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

outside in the dark see a face in the tree thinks its bigfoot come to get me!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I take pains to be Anti-Democrat and Anti-Republican. Because both parties are really gross money & career machines beholden to industry. I really am middle-of-the-road on lots of issues. even though I don't understand what the fuck makes an intelligent conservative tick. but I may just be biased because it's all neo-cons on the news. idk.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Try to pee on the toilet-paper in the toilet so it rips in half

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Does anyone else look at people when there talking and then randomly get in on there conversation.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Flush the toilet right before done peeing so when you're done, the toilet and your pee has been flushed.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

After you wipe your butt and crotch with a towel, you dont want the towel to touch your face. Next night, dry your face and head first.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Sitting next to a banana called James

thumb_up thumb_down -49

I always wonder if anyone has a crush on me.

thumb_up thumb_down -61

Pee in the shower.

thumb_up thumb_down -89

I eat spoons of dry hot chocolate powder when nobody is around.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

When I go to use my laptop if my cat is sleeping in my chair I would use it somewhere else and leave her alone.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Awkward moment... Pretend to send a text.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Sometimes I unintentionally mouth the words being spoken on TV.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Accidentally make a weird noise and quickly turn around frantically to see if anyone else hear it.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

when on long car rides look out the window imagineing stick figures running

thumb_up thumb_down -34

get so shitfaced you wake up in a closet with piss everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down -48

Go up/down the stairs in 10 steps exactly. Talk to an imaginary girlfriend when I'm guilty of something, and she helps me out and holds me till I fall asleep.

thumb_up thumb_down -56

When im going from one room to the next, i try and get into the other room before the door to the last room closes. If i do, I've won.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Constantly refreshing the Captcha for fear that It'll be wrong and I have to redo everything I did.

thumb_up thumb_down -62

I used to do almost everything an even number of times because I thought that if I didn't something bad would happen.

thumb_up thumb_down -120

Not laughing at funny things on T.V. because nobody is around.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

i don't have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Sometimes when you are looking down at a book or something you look up because you think you saw a person. Nope it was a tall lamp with a coat hung on it. Find youself periodically looking up every 5 minutes to make sure.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.