I like to watch lava lamps heat up

I make different scenarios for different songs I listen to. I pretend the walls and couches are people. I talk to them.

rub the underside of your ear lobe to smell the odd smell.

Fill up a glass, drink half, then fill it up again.

While spending the night drinking with my spouse at home, i put a diaper on so i don't have to go to the bathroom every 5 minutes. I also change it for a fresh one when i go to bed.

I like asking my wife how her SIMIANS are doing (the sims 4) because its fun watching her try to hide the fact that it annoys her. Nero, now if you thought Moral Man the Friendly neighbourhood r*pist was bad... Well, thumb me down I dare you! Seriously I totally did not have a certain bitch turkish hacker put a tracker on my laptop si I can find out where you live... And pay some guy to break your kneecaps... I only done it twice though... Here on horsehead network :) Third time is a charm ;) NERO: Actually I paid people five times, the fourth did not do his job, so I pay a fifth to FINISH HIM! (Sometimes I think people on craigslist just like to kill for the fun of it, seriously, eighty bucks?)

I flick my boogers on the carpet knowing that I can just vacuum them up later.

I have the idea that i'm the only one who looks at this site.

Everytime my sibling starts a sentance with "I remember when","I have an idea"etc.,I get up and walk out.

When I am about to thumb up a comment here that has not happened to me, I first stop myself thinking "but that has not happened to me" then I remember I thumb up comments just because I like them and proceed to do so most of the times

i noticed that a lot of people pronounce "LOL" like roll. Am i the only one that reads it as L. O. L. (el oh el) ????

Cover myself in Vaseline and cry in the dark for 4, maybe 5 hours with or without a wooden splintery dildo in my arse.

Sometimes, I have a hard time looking people I know in the eyes but have no trouble looking strangers in the eyes. I wish I knew why. Help!

wipe your hands on your pants

give speeches in the sower for random awards you will never receive.

Make sure I put the deodorant top back on the correct way -- you know, so the sticker is to the front.

While lying in the tub the water gets cold so u turn back on the hot water with ur feet bc u are too lazy to get up and turn it on with your hands

always check thde back seat before starting the car

Sit down in a grass field... immediately start pulling up grass.

Eat everything inside my burgers first then i eat the buns.

i can't watch the t.v. unless the volume ends in a 0 or 5

I doodle on everything I get that can be doodled on, even my exams :)

If someone high fives me on one hand, I need to high five the other one too, or I feel uneven.

Whenever your going down a flight of stairs with two rails, hold the two rails and go from the top step to the bottom.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.