you wonder if things look the same through other peoples eyes

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Pretend that when you are in the shower, the shower head is a giant machine gun, that takes thousands of men to operate, and that you were an extremely large person and you catch ALL of the bullets in your mouth, spitting them at the shower head while at the same time turning off the water as if they all died, and the small drips that continue to drop out were the dead soldires' blood.....-dillon

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get annoyed when people talk on the phone really loudly in front of the TV, forcing you to mute your show, resulting in you missing half of what the people are saying.

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Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

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Hate when people ask "do you have a bathroom?" It's like "no we crap in the yard!"

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Start to pray at night, but get bored and stop in 2 min.

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I get mad at women because they menstruate and that's gross. I don't judge one woman individually for it, but I'm disgusted with the whole gender, which leads to being almost disgusted with myself for being attracted to them.

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When I'm in the shower i let the water run off my arms and fingers and pretend I'm a giant god of water sending torrents to the miniature people below.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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when i m in a car i'll look at the letters on license plates and try to think of words that you can make-or almost make- with those letters

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Wonder if I have a twin across the world and he makes all the opposite decisions.

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When I walk the streets after getting a new haircut, I think everybody's staring at me and thinking "oh my god she got a new haircut" eventhough they didn't know me before.

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setting your alarm early so that when you wake up you see you still have time to sleep and you're like YES!!!

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I try really hard to come up with a funny joke on antijokes.com, then I give up and come to this website instead.

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lie in bed, stare at the ceiling fan, focus on only one blade, and see how long your eyesight can follow it.

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Nero the clit collector. What+ you never collected stamps, coins or something? YOUR CRIMES! WHAT ARE YOUR CRIMES FOR FUCKlNG CRIMES SAKE ETC.

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After learning a new word, I hear it used and written EVERYWHERE for the next week.

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During an assembly, I try to be the last one to clap/ stand up/ sit down.

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I don't know why but I really wish I can ride a bike or drive a car through a shopping mall.

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Put things in the front of the dishwasher 1st cause im to lazy to pull the whole thing out to put anything in the back or the right place.

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When you're in your late teens, you blare the car stereo when driving near girls that are walking. When you grow up, you turn the radio down in fear that you look like a tool bag.

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When you get lost while driving, the first thing you do is turn down the radio.

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hate it when the bottom of you foot is itchy because it feels wrong to scratch it.

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When im blazed i like of all the stupid shit i did that day but always tell myself "its fine, i didnt feel dumb about those things sober"

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.