I always feel like i have to eat something while watching a movie that I've seen so many times.

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i feel all weird and sad when i thing about my old belongings.

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after switching lights..i go run as hard as i could do after reaching the bed

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speak proper english

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from now on in gonna eat healthier! *seeing chocolate* hm... okay i'll make an exemption today but from TOMORROW on!!!

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....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

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Just think about this. I do. What if we are all a character from The Sims and there is someone controlling us as their character and we never really did anything by our own choice. Creepy.

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Playing a sad song that talks about your current situation and then looking in the mirror or out the window pretending you are in a sad music video.

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Sometimes when I'm sitting next to a random person having a conversation with them (in the car for instance) I imagine myself reaching out and holding their hand. I then get super embarrassed just for having the thought.

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I always find myself criticizing some commercials on television like the first time I see them I think nothing of it but the third or fourth time I think hey wait a second...

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I can see a magic eye image

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Complimenting a girl awkwardly,and then smiling stupidly later and thinking of alternate versions of the conversation that happened!!

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Check the shower before you pee to make sure nothing is waiting there to literally get you with your pants down.

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When a teacher at school leaves a line of pen on the big whiteboard, my attention can NOT be drawn from it.

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I never take drinks into smelly places, out of fear that the smell will somehow get into my drink and contaminate the taste.

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Seriously I am tired but, I read the fucking solvemedia stating "forget this", then I stood there for a moment having just forgot what I was supposed to type. "Was I not supposed to forget what I just read?" Nero: BRAINWASHING! FORGET THIS AND LET ME SPEAK TO YOUR MOTHER! IM LEUTANANT BANGUS YOUR MUTHERUS YOU IDIOT!

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When no one is home, I poop with the door open, just because I can.

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eat the muffin bottom because it isn't as good as the top and i want to get it over with

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I think about life problems in the shower

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When I step on something pokey, I don't say the quick "OW" that is expected, I go the extra syllable and a say "JOW!"

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When im standing at a urinal and another guy was there before me and i still finish first i pretend like im still peeing so he wont think i have a bladder problem.

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Sex scene comes on TV while you are watching with your parents... Try to act normal... Fail.

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Go to the kitchen to eat, forget what I'm doing, go back to whatever I was doing, and realizing that I'm hungry.

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This is kind of embarrassing... after I watched "Truman Show" I went home and talked to my mirror like Jim Carrey does in the film.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.