push a fart out really slow so you think nobody will hear it

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Try to see nipples through body paint.

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when being in the bathroom at night, avoid looking in the mirror

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Go up stairs two steps at a time. Avoid those stairs forever if there are an odd number and I have to end in a single step.

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Reach my hand inside the room to turn the light on before I go in.

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Get excited when the clock reads 12:34. especially when its a digital that can also read 12:34.56.

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If there's leaves on the ground and the wind picks it up and makes like swirls I put my arms out to make it seem I'm controlling the swirls.

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When I see someones comment has alot of dislikes , I add on to it .

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Stalk people on facebook, find out something interesting, and later claim that it 'came up on your newsfeed'.

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I always feel as if someone is always watching me on a screen where ever I am, and every person in the world is also being watched as well

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When a room is dark and the light is really far away, I close my eyes to feel my way to the lamp.

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fall asleep in the shower.

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I brush my teeth in the shower and use the shower for a waterpik.

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If I'm home alone, I tell myself good night when I am getting cozy in bed. I even use my name.

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I have an unhealthy obsession with and so always talk about Penge North Korea beige mauve and medium density fiberboard. This explains why I'm such a popular guy

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Lay in bed , and think what i could of said while i was talking to my crush or what could of happen.

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Say a word I just learned over and over again until it loses meaning.

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Legally changing your name to Peter Jankins just cuz

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Check my underwear for any sh!t from farts (yes, sometimes my shit comes with a fart) captcha: royal flush

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Meet a really cool girl imagine the rest of my life with her.

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When I'm running a bath I sometimes sit and look at myself in the mirror and act out conversations with people I've never talked to or celebrities, and when I say something that sounds good I'll repeat it over and over again until I nail huge emotions on my face.

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Whenever I am in a conversation with someone, be it a family member, close friend, or stranger, I nearly always imagine either starting a random brawl with them for no reason (i.e. punching them in the face) or making out with them or something, neither of which I would ever consider doing. Am I alone?

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Sometimes I'll think about something that's so weird nobody would ever do it, and then i figure there's a big chance somebody did it at least once in history.

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I feel like I'm superman every time I run by the counter in the kitchen and the papers on it go flying off.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.