push a fart out really slow so you think nobody will hear it

Try to see nipples through body paint.

when being in the bathroom at night, avoid looking in the mirror

Go up stairs two steps at a time. Avoid those stairs forever if there are an odd number and I have to end in a single step.

Reach my hand inside the room to turn the light on before I go in.

Get excited when the clock reads 12:34. especially when its a digital that can also read 12:34.56.

If there's leaves on the ground and the wind picks it up and makes like swirls I put my arms out to make it seem I'm controlling the swirls.

When I see someones comment has alot of dislikes , I add on to it .

Stalk people on facebook, find out something interesting, and later claim that it 'came up on your newsfeed'.

I always feel as if someone is always watching me on a screen where ever I am, and every person in the world is also being watched as well

When a room is dark and the light is really far away, I close my eyes to feel my way to the lamp.

fall asleep in the shower.

I brush my teeth in the shower and use the shower for a waterpik.

If I'm home alone, I tell myself good night when I am getting cozy in bed. I even use my name.

I have an unhealthy obsession with and so always talk about Penge North Korea beige mauve and medium density fiberboard. This explains why I'm such a popular guy

Lay in bed , and think what i could of said while i was talking to my crush or what could of happen.

Say a word I just learned over and over again until it loses meaning.

Legally changing your name to Peter Jankins just cuz

Check my underwear for any sh!t from farts (yes, sometimes my shit comes with a fart) captcha: royal flush

Meet a really cool girl imagine the rest of my life with her.

When I'm running a bath I sometimes sit and look at myself in the mirror and act out conversations with people I've never talked to or celebrities, and when I say something that sounds good I'll repeat it over and over again until I nail huge emotions on my face.

Whenever I am in a conversation with someone, be it a family member, close friend, or stranger, I nearly always imagine either starting a random brawl with them for no reason (i.e. punching them in the face) or making out with them or something, neither of which I would ever consider doing. Am I alone?

Sometimes I'll think about something that's so weird nobody would ever do it, and then i figure there's a big chance somebody did it at least once in history.

I feel like I'm superman every time I run by the counter in the kitchen and the papers on it go flying off.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.