im going to kill that person and get away with it

thumb_up thumb_down -85

Sometimes I wipe my butt so violently that my finger goes through the toilet paper and into my butt hole. I enjoy it and question my sexuality. ;)

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Reach my hand inside the room to turn the light on before I go in.

thumb_up thumb_down +2,509

Not answer a question or something of the sort Evan if you know you know the answer because you are paranoid that you are wrong.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

When someone close to me sadly passes on and later when I am listening to the radio if I hear a song that sounds suitable to that moment I kind of make that our song if that makes sense to any of you

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Go to websites like this during school and laugh at the things I read. All around me other students are actually working and looking at me.

thumb_up thumb_down -53

When I get photographed with a flash and afterwards there is that little greenish dot in my vision, I keep trying to look at it directly, although I know that it's impossible

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Everytime I look at the clock it see so say 4 20 9 11 or 11 11

thumb_up thumb_down -66

I masturbate with sandpaper

thumb_up thumb_down -48

get annoyed by people singing a song only to show off their brilliant voice and automatically think that they cannot sing as good as they think they can

thumb_up thumb_down -85

Try stick to something but fail in the end

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Close all the windows on my computer when parents walk in.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

I like to watch lava lamps heat up

thumb_up thumb_down -126

I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

thumb_up thumb_down -46

I act as though I've had movie cameras placed in my eyes and a bunch of people will watch my life as a movie at some point. And so I do a narration voice for them.

thumb_up thumb_down +159

When the T.V switches to commercial sometimes I forget what I was watching Noel

thumb_up thumb_down +18

get annoyed when the pop-up lid on the dish soap bottle is left up

thumb_up thumb_down -19

I eat one way in public and another way in private.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

When I walking the same direction as other people, I secretly race them and do the sports commentry in my head

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

thumb_up thumb_down -2

When I'm on Facebook, I flip between someone's most recent profile picture and their first one, just to see how much they've changed.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

I pretend I'm a really popular YouTuber and talk to nobody thinking they're my subscribers.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

thumb_up thumb_down -66

When you're in a public place, make up conversations between strangers. Example: Man to wife: Let's get out of here. There's no place to sit. Wife to man: Honey, we just got here. Man to wife: Maybe you didn't understand, Martha. There's no place to sit.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.