I enjoy my company, I love myself, which is contagious, people around me enjoy my company, and love themselves. Moral: Thumb me down and prove you are a sad fuck TODAY!

I'm so used to pooping with my phone that everytime I forget it I take less than 5 minutes, versus the usual 26.

Everytime I have ear buds in and I hear myself breathing, I think others can hear it too so I slow my breathing or hold my breath.

When watching the news and see all those children and other innocent people die at wars, in my mind I shout at God and ask him why he doesn't give me the sign and my powers to save the world. J.C.

act like a giant/dinosaur while eating broccoli xD

Sometimes I put on my running shoes to make myself feel like I worked out but I really didn't.

I tell inanimate objects what to do.

draw pictures on the mirror from the shower steam

Shutting the fridge door slowly just to see the light shut off.

I am sure that no one else has the same mental slowness as me and my brother. When I say mauve he says maeve and we continue like this for hours. It is certainly an exciting way of eating up those motorway miles:)

If its dark and you have to go with rhe stairs i do that running because i tink somebody is behind my

I have an irrational fear of sloths

When using the bathroom count the tiles on the floor or shower wall or read a shampoo bottle.

When I'm laying in bed in the dark and I close my eyes for a while then when I open them again I quickly scan for a light source just to make sure I can still see.

Have a dream with horribly unfortunate events (like having an amputation or being in prison) waking up from said dream and saying something like, "Good thing that was a dream, don't know what I'd do if that was real"

Nero the clit collector. What+ you never collected stamps, coins or something? YOUR CRIMES! WHAT ARE YOUR CRIMES FOR FUCKlNG CRIMES SAKE ETC.

see if I can hold my breath when walking down a long hallway

Pee in the shower

Put toilet paper in the toilet before I'm going to take a shit, so that the toilet won't get dirty.

Thinking you're very popular after you have owned someone at school.

At the gym, I always try to do 5 pounds more than the previous person.

I hate it when people assume I'm smart just because I don't speak much and I wear glasses.

read some posts and then sit with friends and try to come up with some good things for this website

When i feel the back of my right hand starting to itch. in a few days, i get some money. When the back of my left hand itches.Some money goes.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.