when i eat, i sometimes switch which side of my mouth i chew my food with to even it out.

Imagining how it would feel to switch bodies with your crush

When In the car, use th bug guts to ramp up all of the culverts and when you don't have a landing for a while, pretend that you got a speed bonus and are soaring with some amazing air.-dillon

When posting these, I'm rarely able to read the words/letters in the box that prove you're human and not some computer virus. Now I'm starting to think I'm not a human......

Stepping on a concrete sidewalk square the exact amount of times as the others.

Stalk people on facebook, find out something interesting, and later claim that it 'came up on your newsfeed'.

Open the fridge, nothing there, close fridge, open again just to make sure nothing has magically appeared

I look at people and think, "they poop" then as I'm imagining them pooping I hurry and change thoughts before they finish.

Rapidly click the mouse when your computer is frozen, even though you know it won't do anything to help whatsoever.

when a sex scene comes on the tv i try make up an excuse to go somewhere like i need a drink or a pee.

Answering questions that weren't directed at me, then awkwardly playing it off like they were talking to you.

whale sperm

Check the toilet paper after wiping your ass

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Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk without insurance and crashing into legal citizens who pay taxes and insurance leaving us with a debt in medical bills so that we cant afford physical therapy.

Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

masturbate as soon as the opportunity arrises. "You'll be home alone all day" "Ok, bye.....*fap fap fap*"

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <<

When no one's looking, I run up stairs on hands and feet.

I sit sideways on the toilet because my bony butt fits better that way.

When i need to poop i place toilet paper over the water so it doesn't splash up and hit my rectum.

I hold my breath in elevators

Drink out the carton (your whole family prob does it)

scratch that bit between my balls and arse when it gets itchy, then carry on scratching for ages cos it feels so damn good

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.