i always wipe the ketchup off my face with the bread of my sandwich

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When your talking to a hot girl and then picture her naked with you in bed but then stop thinking about that because you think she can read your mind

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Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

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Before I sing in the car, I always have to make sure I haven’t accidently butt-dialed anyone. –Ikka

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The last meal I have before I get on a plane - I think about how it is food in one city and will be crapped out in another.

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I have to make a breathing hole for fresh air to come in when I am laying under a hot blanket.

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Picking your dogs booger for him/her

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Saying "ouch!" when someone throws something and it hits an inanimate object.. -Sarah

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When theres a car just like yours right next to your car in the parking lot you almoat always gravitate to that car instead. It's the worst when there people in the car and you keep trying to open it.

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Too lazy to exercise. Think to self "I'm gonna work out tomorrow." - instantly feel better about self. Still didn't exercise.

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When I'm laying in bed, I make sure that my feet are covered and not hanging off the edge so that monsters don't eat them in my sleep.

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Sometimes when I look at something up close, I alternate closing each eye and looking at the object from the other eye, then switch again. I do it really fast to make it look like that thing is moving. It's really entertaining.

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When at a friend's or another person's house, I pee while standing up. But at home, I always sit down when i pee.

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I walk down the stairs sideways because I'm afraid something will get me.

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I get angry when people use question marks where they don't belong. QUESTION marks are for QUESTIONS. Not statements or opinions >:( "But whatever I don't care I mean that's your opinion?" X FFFUU- "But whatever I don't care I mean that's your opinion." ?

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Look at my poop before flushing

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turn the colour down on your tv and pretend what you are watching is an old movie

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I cant ride a bike

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talking on the phone with somebody and then spending 10 minutes or so looking for your phone...

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Typing what you want to put in a message, then deleting it because you daren't send it

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When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

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Dance in the car just so the person you like will see you and be like "Aw, cute" but then they don't even see you so you stop...

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When watching TV shows, I always think about what I would have done differently if I was the character in that particular situation.

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Embarassingly repeatedly use of the word "bro" when irritated or excited.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.