Race the microwave. Not literally, by the way.

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When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

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When texting someone on the toilet & they ask, "What are you doing?" I respond with, "Oh, just chillin." LOL. -Jade

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Wonder what would happen if you started screaming and defecating in public.

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Think of someone you love while trying to fall asleep.

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Somethings thinking: O God, I love this world.

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turn off the tv by accident and then turn it on only to find that it takes forever to work again

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Save more than once on your favourite game.

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Legally changing your name to Peter Jankins just cuz

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Stare blankly at your desktop when someone walks in the room so they won't know that you were watching porn lol

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You pretend to fight imaginary people while no ones looking:/ But you look like the star wars kid...

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Use an entirely different vocabulary in your head than everyday life.

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If I'm in the car looking for an address or a street name I'll turn down the radio. Why?

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when im alone and in a bad mood i make stupid faces with my eyes closed and try and figure out how stupid i looked. then i start laughing hysterically because i think that im an idiot. then i repeat this process until i have to pee from laughing so hard because im already in the bathroom so why not utilize the toilet, rather than waiting for a commercial and speed-peeing because im scared that i missed some of the show i was watching :D -Grace-

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smile when you find out that the things you only do is right.

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When listening to a song with headphones or on the radio i sing the harmonies or make them while they sing the lead

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send a text to some one and act like you "meant" to send it to someone else.

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feel like im being watched turn my head sideways and see someone suddenly look away.

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when you read a post that you don't do then start doing it

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Deside to watch a video in bed on your phone or iPad and drop it on your face...

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When watching the news and see all those children and other innocent people die at wars, in my mind I shout at God and ask him why he doesn't give me the sign and my powers to save the world. J.C.

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If I'm alone, I'll imagine myself as somebody else an start acting as if I'm in a different life, complete with different people and places because in my imagination, I get to control what is going to happen next. Because, my imagination is way better than my reality.

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I'm ridiculously turned on by the scent nail polish.

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When you accidentally like get something on your hand so you go to wash it off but feel compelled to wash your other hand too even if it's not dirty

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.