When I watch porn, I only watch like the first 5-10 minutes of it. To be honest I wonder why people bother making them longer too.

Spend countless hours looking at cars online I know I'll never be able to afford

do a fake cough when my shit is falling in the toilet

Search for blackheads on your arms for hours just because youre bored!

When they say the name of the movie in the movie i get excited o.O

I violate and then kill people, all ages and kinds... ..:But everyone does that right? I mean... Lol, I just type that because I am insecure now, and I kill when I am insecure... ...Excuse me.

When I get in the car I look in the backseat for monsters or psychopathic killers and as I am turning to check I say out loud 'Oh, maybe my book is in the backseat, let me check' so the monster or killer doesn't know I'm really looking back there for them. That way they might not kill me.

I like to turn the lights off in the bathroom, actually block every little bit of light I possibly can, then take a nice warm shower, curl up on the floor, block my ears and enjoy the warm water and sensory deprivation.

Think about having sex with the dog. You wouldn't, but what if you did?

I wonder what it wonder be like to have a really tall girlfriend?

when on long car rides look out the window imagineing stick figures running

Look at the clock to realize that it seems like the "second" hand is taking longer on the number its on right when you look at it, and/or you looked at the clock at the absolute perfect time. And it happens frequently..

Doing something private and think "What if my mom/dad/boss etc. saw me now?"

I take a dump and then look to see how big it is.

Taking the little rings off the top of my bottles.

Courtesy flush.

Read shampoo bottle when no magazine in bathroom.

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When I first start dating or seeing someone I write down options for conversation starters before I phone them in case it goes silent.

creating your own personal perfect partner in romance or frendship, almost like a imaginary friend (but you don't speak to them out loud)

When I'm home alone at night, and the lights are on so you can't see anything out the windows, I will stop randomly and stare out the window to make anyone watching me think I know that they are there.

I like wet humping better than f*cking. but sometimes it slips in anyway, and it's that's pretty enjoyable too. and mt girlfriend is cool with. ... so it's actualy pretty whatevs either way. but wet humping is my jam.

When dunking oreos I like to hold it under the milk and watch the bubbles til they stop

Whenever I look in the bathroom mirror, I fear that I will see a terrible bloody monster standing behind me. I convince myself of this so completely that I panic and rush out right after I pee.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.