i wonder why someone decided to spell words unusually for example why couldn't because be spelt becuz the way it sounds?!

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When im alone i rub myself in vasaline and pretend that im a slug on the kitchen floor.

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Go back to the song if I don't here what they sang Kay

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Pee in the garbage at night when I don't want to wake the whole house up.

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I never take drinks into smelly places, out of fear that the smell will somehow get into my drink and contaminate the taste.

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Say something smart in class, then worry your friends will rip ony uo for it half way through saying it, so end it by saying "or something like that."

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I wonder what it wonder be like to have a really tall girlfriend?

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When you are outside, you see a small shadow moving across the ground. You think it's a ball someone threw, so you look up to catch it, only to realize it is a bird.

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.don't congratulate someone on facebook until someone other does, because maybe it's a fail.

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The older I get the more honest I get

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Use the toilet shower to wipe your a**, but denies the fact until death for your friends.

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Taking the time to lick all of the cream off of the inside of an Oreo.

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acting as if you can shoot with a banana

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Listening to my iPod with other people walking by me or sitting near me and feeling mysterious and cool.

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Guessing how many people are listening to the same song at the same moment as you

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I try to move inanimate objects/set things on fire/control the elements with my mind.

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Look an ugly person up and down and try to think of ways that they can improve how they look. ( clothing, hair, and makeup)

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When you get out of the shower and you're too lazy to get dressed, so you just hang around in a towel.

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I get into a massive fight with my parents, and then do the thing i was told not to just so i can tick them off.

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Have to take the phone with you everytime to the bathroom

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I daydream about what would happen if my phone rang in public and I had a ringtone of a cool song and what people think about the song and if they think I'm cool for it, or if they see some sort of symbolic meaning in the song. I do this while pacing around my room listening to the song. I think about what people I know would think about certain lyrics in the song. I do this all the time.

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When I'm walking at night, I put up my hood and grin evilly at passing cars so it'll scare the drivers if they see

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My most intimate moments are constantly interrupted by the same thought..."oh, God...what if there is a secret security cam in here...CUT TO: oh God...can my dead grandparents see me now????"

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Think about all of the germs that are on restroom doors and water taps.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.