When you lie in bed and imagine scenarios that will never happen.

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Everytime aplane is flying low you think it's going to crash right in front of your eyes

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Turn volume down on iPod or tv, then turn up one bar to make it seem like it's still loud.

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When you try to blur eyes and keep them like that when you look around the room.

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Sometimes I wipe my butt so violently that my finger goes through the toilet paper and into my butt hole. I enjoy it and question my sexuality. ;)

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When I'm on Facebook, I flip between someone's most recent profile picture and their first one, just to see how much they've changed.

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While waiting on someone I check my phone and if there is no new message I just read old ones, just to be occupied and don't look stupid or lost

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instinctively thumb down long posts without reading them.

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Realizing that when you look behind a shower curtain before using the bathroom and actually see a Serial killer, you have no plan...

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If I'm in my room and I need to fart, I walk into someone else's room and fart in there so that my room doesn't stink up.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <<

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Sleep in your jeans because you think it feels comfortable in the morning.

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When I'm riding in the car, I'll spot a tree, make it my goal and try to beat the car on the opposite side of the road to it. (Seriously I don't think anyone else does this!)

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Check my underwear for any sh!t from farts (yes, sometimes my shit comes with a fart) captcha: royal flush

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When taking a shower, and standing in the opposite direction where the water is coming fromY

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Thinking that you're the only person on Earth, and everyone else is there just to affect you.

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I always twist my washcloth into a cone shape, so when I take my next shower it is dry and hardened. Then I pretend stab it into my stomach and say "MY LIFE FOR AIUR!" before getting it wet again.

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On the bus think in your mind "I know you're reading my mind right now," and look for reactions.

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Having an OCD moment when the number of questions on a test is not a multiple of 5. I mean, who puts 47 questions on a test?! Or 53? English and Math teachers rarely do this but it's always the Histoy ones...

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write a test and the information i studied most is not on the test

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Try to pet your cat with your foot.

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Take a side of bacon and jack off watching Babe.

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Fake an orgasm after only 30 seconds, watch the "wtf" look on her face then laugh hysterically.

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Boinked my neighbor

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.