When at someone else's house, trying to use the bathroom, keep a very close eye on the door just to make sure nobody's gonna walk in on you...

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Suck up stuff with the vacuum you know you shouldn't because your too lazy to pick it up.

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ur parents never pay attention to u but when they do they r yelling at u

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Pick your butt and then wipe your hand/fingers somewhere hoping that the smell dosn't stick to you and that no one smells it....

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Sometimes when im sitting in class i start thinking how i would save the whole classroom if someone was to come in with a gun and start shooting.

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Walking around store and store clerk asks are you finding everything ok..and you reply yes and you...

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When your at your friends house and they run out of toilet paper, so you sit there like "what do i do now?"

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When I watch a movie that terrifies me, I usually find myself sitting on the sofa with a kitchen knife in my hand at the end of the movie.

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Thinking about life as if its just a dream and wondeing if one day your just going to wake up and be like " wtf just happend".....

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you know that when things have only one like on this site, the people who wrote it liked it

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Sometimes I wonder who created words. For instance, who thought to call a fence a fence? It could have been called something completely random like bucxbuw, but it would seem normal to us and fence would seem like jibberish instead.

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Pour a bowl of cereal. Open fridge. No milk. (karky)

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I sometimes put posts not just of things I do but also of things I know other people do

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wait up to 14 days just to find the opportunity to use one, really good, joke.

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When I'm home alone, turning the TV on so it's not so quiet

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something happens with a person that u were close to but then they become an asshole, u get mad, and when u stop talking feel really depressed even though u hate them

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toilet:a place for reading and going on fb shower:place for singing school:place for sleeping and fuck others.internet:place for shitting brixs.

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Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

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WHEN I SHOW YOU A PICTURE ON MY PHONE..DON’T SWIPE LEFT.DON’T SWIPE RIGHT.JUST LOOK. Via: Collection of Love WhatsApp Status

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waking up from an amazing/awesome dream and spend the rest of the day thinking up of new senarios to come after...

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Liking your own posts to make it seem like at least 1 person likes you. thinking that maybe someone will be slightly compelled to like it because someone already did.

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Will use delayed foot-to-ass insults on verbal bullies. You know, the kind that goes off in the persons head days or weeks after they thought they won an argument with me.

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Start walking down a busy street or mall, and realise I've gone the wrong way. Suddenly stop and pretend to read something on my phone for a few seconds before turning round and walking the right way.

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put a load of loo roll in the loo before taking a dump at work so it silences the landing.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.