i wonder why someone decided to spell words unusually for example why couldn't because be spelt becuz the way it sounds?!

When im alone i rub myself in vasaline and pretend that im a slug on the kitchen floor.

Go back to the song if I don't here what they sang Kay

Pee in the garbage at night when I don't want to wake the whole house up.

I never take drinks into smelly places, out of fear that the smell will somehow get into my drink and contaminate the taste.

Say something smart in class, then worry your friends will rip ony uo for it half way through saying it, so end it by saying "or something like that."

I wonder what it wonder be like to have a really tall girlfriend?

When you are outside, you see a small shadow moving across the ground. You think it's a ball someone threw, so you look up to catch it, only to realize it is a bird.

.don't congratulate someone on facebook until someone other does, because maybe it's a fail.

The older I get the more honest I get

Use the toilet shower to wipe your a**, but denies the fact until death for your friends.

Taking the time to lick all of the cream off of the inside of an Oreo.

acting as if you can shoot with a banana

Listening to my iPod with other people walking by me or sitting near me and feeling mysterious and cool.

Guessing how many people are listening to the same song at the same moment as you

I try to move inanimate objects/set things on fire/control the elements with my mind.

Look an ugly person up and down and try to think of ways that they can improve how they look. ( clothing, hair, and makeup)

When you get out of the shower and you're too lazy to get dressed, so you just hang around in a towel.

I get into a massive fight with my parents, and then do the thing i was told not to just so i can tick them off.

Have to take the phone with you everytime to the bathroom

I daydream about what would happen if my phone rang in public and I had a ringtone of a cool song and what people think about the song and if they think I'm cool for it, or if they see some sort of symbolic meaning in the song. I do this while pacing around my room listening to the song. I think about what people I know would think about certain lyrics in the song. I do this all the time.

When I'm walking at night, I put up my hood and grin evilly at passing cars so it'll scare the drivers if they see

My most intimate moments are constantly interrupted by the same thought..."oh, God...what if there is a secret security cam in here...CUT TO: oh God...can my dead grandparents see me now????"

Think about all of the germs that are on restroom doors and water taps.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.