Lying in be and pretending you are in a tv show, the characters best friend, playing it out in your mind. Or you dream while awake, and you control it, and you fly to Hollywood and become your faborite celebrities best friend.

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I only make the tv volume in multiples of 5.

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Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk without insurance and crashing into legal citizens who pay taxes and insurance leaving us with a debt in medical bills so that we cant afford physical therapy.

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speak proper english

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Wish that Mexicans would go fix things in their own country instead of coming here unwelcome and demanding things instead.

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When your to lazy try to use the force to pick things up

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Before going to bed look around the dark room and when you see something suspicious you have a look to see its not a person

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Whenever we watch a movie or stupid educational film in school, I sleep.

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I stick one foot out of my blanket so I'm not hot or cold.

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When I get bored of sex and p*rn, I download animal "mating" stuff for variation.

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listening to music and not realizing ur favorite song is on until the last word

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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When I can't find my phone so I panic and shearch everywhere only to find out it was in my pocket.

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I pretend to get future messages. Like when I'm about to have a bad subject. I get a message from future me telling present me like 'Oh god. Yeah, brace yourself for science today.'

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When you're scared of the bathroom and you close your eyes you quickly look around to check if there's a monster or something in the mirror

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Get scared of the dark while in bed, so you make sure all limbs are tucked nice and tight under the covers. Once done, you now feel safe..

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I aphabeticalize my shoes

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Whenever I Iook into the mirror, I think there's a second evil dimension.

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I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

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I only used to eat McCoys Salt & Vinegar crisps when it was raining, because I thought they tasted better when it rains. Anyone else?

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I use the internet to validate that weirdness is not actually weird at all.

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When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

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I talk through my teeth when i am talking to my pets.

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Constantly refresh your email page even though you know nothing will appear.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.