Before drinking the actual soft drink, I drink the fizz as fast as I can.

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Whenever I am in a dark room at night, and there is a window with blinds with a light shining through, I stand in front of it and pretend I am wearing a striped prison jumpsuit.

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What do you call a rapist in your house? Your father.

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To my comment below... Rest im peace MJ... Shhh! Mary Jane is resting!

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Sometimes at night, I find myself imagining people I know saying my name, trying to get my attention in my head. They won't stop until I respond out loud.

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Make a little song with tiny breaths out of your nose

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When taking a shower, and standing in the opposite direction where the water is coming fromY

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(I have made this mistake mostly when I'm at the movies) When the cashier gives me the ticket and says enjoy the movie because I am so used to people saying have a nice day I say you too!(FACE PALM)

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Putting salt on dry toast, yum!

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When in a public bathroom and others are in there, pretend to fix your clothes/hair until everyone has left before you use it.

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Every time i find an insect in my basement i grab it put it in the toilet and pee on it victoriously while its being flushed down. But Im a nice guy, and i worry about this evil hatred i have towards insects.

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forget i left the light on somewhere in the house and when i see it on i think a ghost did it..

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stop the microwave when I hear the food popping

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Consider selling lots of books, games or DVDs when you have too many to fit perfectly on their shelf.

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Open Fridge, look around for few seconds, say to self - 'What the f*** am I doing?'

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Listen to song and think of a great montage that would go with it.

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I Masturbate Daily.

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chewing icecream before you swallow it

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Layer the water in the toilet with toilet paper, so when I poo the water does splash back up and splatter poo and water all over my bum

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Any time I hear someone speaking with an accent, I start mimicking that accident. –Ikka

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Waking up from a really bad dream that you thought was real and then thinking about it all day worried that it actually happened

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sometimes when I listen to a song while riding in the car I look out the window and pretend I'm in some angsty music video

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Get exstremly sad or depressed whenever you think about something you did that was embarrassing or something you regret infront of someone when that person probably doesn't even remember it....

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Watch scary movies even though your afraid of the dark.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.