when u start laughing then start clapping and look like a seal

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Not doing any work Feel guilty about it Then still do no work

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Reading the terms of service :O....

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I type things i really want to say to people and then delete them straight away because im too chicken to say it.

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I pretend that I've caught the man in the walk/don't walk sign doing something bad and I stare at him accusingly

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Sometimes I imagine that I am in a coma and all of the things of this world are not real. Then when I wake up from the coma I will be the best inventor of all time.

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Hate to type Morals under each one of my posts Moral: A small chick in the hand is better than a huge C**K up your ass. I am pretty sure not even women nor homosexuals want birds up there...Then again, I havent searched for anything like that at the intern... they are eating her! And now they are gonna eat me! OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD! (fly stuck on head)

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Fantasize a situation that turns you into a person with superpowers or something.

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Sleep in your jeans because you think it feels comfortable in the morning.

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if someone posts something disgusting but true on this same site, rethink pressing the "thumbs up" button out of embaressment.

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Fart at home

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turn off the tv by accident and then turn it on only to find that it takes forever to work again

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when the teacher is asking the class something and i have no idea I'm looking at the paper in front of me, pretending to still making notes and thinking to myself 'don't take me, don't take me...'

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I'm in a hurry I press the elevator button several times

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If you see someone singing in a car, then search on the radio stations to find the matching song to the the miming you see.

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I find it really hard to not respond a insulting youtube comment with a hopefully even bigger insult.

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When you're having a discussion or an argument with someone and you are about to say something important then you completely forget what you were going to say.

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Take a side of bacon and jack off watching Babe.

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Read this site's posts, think of something awesome to write but then forget it because you decided to read more and finish the page rather than write it immediately.

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Only taking half a biscuit because it makes you feel bad and then taking another half of a different biscuit.

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Open blinds when taking a poop to look outside, then realize that someone could be watching you.

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Always look down at the floor or avoiding any kind of eye contact when your getting told off for something really bad

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try to rip the top off an Oreo without messing up the cream and then if the cream comes out on both parts not wanting to eat the Oreo because its wrong.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.