only read the short jokes on this website

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I lift my butt when I'm farting

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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When walking on the sidewalk, try to walk the same number of steps on each square without looking awkward. (now, this is sooo weird, I have no clue if ANYBODY has ever done this more than once)

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I'm constantly struck with this odd sensation that I didn't wipe my ass well enough.

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http://www.todayswhatsappstatus.com/

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When you drop something and then drop it again as soon as you start picking it up

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When calling someone you hang up after 3 or 4 rings because you're tired of waiting rather than it being time to leave a message.

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join online argument even though you have no idea what the argument is about

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I praise the honesty of you all! :) I think confessing here is kind of fun...am I alone?

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I avoid closing my eyes in the shower in case ghosts/monsters/zombies get me.

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Someone waves at me and I wave back...and then I realize they were waving at someone behind me.

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even though you know you turned the light off, you have to go check before you can get to sleep

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Sorry I posted last comment 3 times. And it is best ever not beat ever.

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I used to drive home from my girlfriend's house late at night and stop on a stretch of road to take a leak. I'd walk backwards while peeing, creating a crooked line of pee in the road. I'd add to it night after night, then I'd drive by in the day to see my long pee stain in the road only I knew about. Anyone who passed by could see it, but only I knew what it was. It would last until the next rain and I'd have to start over.

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Cope with serious things by not taking them seriously.

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I make different scenarios for different songs I listen to. I pretend the walls and couches are people. I talk to them.

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When no one is around I make sound effects for everything I do.

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Open the fridge, nothing there, close fridge, open again just to make sure nothing has magically appeared

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Realized with 7 billion people, there is a chance that someone else on earth is doing exactly the same thing as me at any given time.

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Stick ur thumb between ur first and middle finger without realizing it

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I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because f*ck the NSA.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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I am such a coward. When I'm going to have an argument or complain to someone, I think of the beat ever retort, but when it comes down to it I say "why are you so mean" or " why don't you just leave me alone for once" or something like that. ( Yes I get picked on, cos I'm the smartest in our class)

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.