Whenever I Iook into the mirror, I think there's a second evil dimension.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

thumb_up thumb_down -112

I only used to eat McCoys Salt & Vinegar crisps when it was raining, because I thought they tasted better when it rains. Anyone else?

thumb_up thumb_down -60

When you trip when your walking you try to play it off like you wanted to start running

thumb_up thumb_down -33

I can't piss with my shoes on.

thumb_up thumb_down -73

I use the internet to validate that weirdness is not actually weird at all.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

thumb_up thumb_down -79

I talk through my teeth when i am talking to my pets.

thumb_up thumb_down -56

If someone uses a term thats like, in the know, and they ask if i know what it means, ill act like, of course ido, even if i dont, and then ill go home and look it up.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

When I drink out of a disposable coffee cup with a lid, the opening on the lid has be on the exact opposite side from the seam where the cup is glued to form the cylinder.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

I don't like to answer the phone because it is never for me.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Constantly refresh your email page even though you know nothing will appear.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Think about past screw ups, then cross my eyes thinking to myself "I'm such a F---ing retard."

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Sometimes I imagine that I am in a coma and all of the things of this world are not real. Then when I wake up from the coma I will be the best inventor of all time.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

When I'm cooking, I mumble everything I'm doing under my breath like I'm in a cooking show and I'm talking to the audience.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

look at old toys from when you were a kid and remember how they taste.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Tell myself that I'm only going for a 20 minute nap and end up sleeping for 1/+ hour(s)...

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Write something down here so that it seems like you think its normal when your actually really paranoid that its not.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

I use my magic powers to give shaddy politicians their comeuppance (I don't have any magic powers lol)

thumb_up thumb_down -88

sometimes I can be really tired but when I go to bed I lie there for hours awake

thumb_up thumb_down -24

fart and talk thinking it will cover the smell

thumb_up thumb_down -44

You do a retarded dance when a song you don't like comes on

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Sit on the loo and think about life because I can't be bothered to get up

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Worry that I'm will go schizophrenic.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.