from now on in gonna eat healthier! *seeing chocolate* hm... okay i'll make an exemption today but from TOMORROW on!!!

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blink

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Manage to be more AWESOME! THAN YOU IN EVERY SINGLE WAY! YES YOU! YOU DONT HIDE FROM ME! YEAH CHANGE THE PAGE LIKE THE PUSSY YOU ARE, COME OVER HERE INTO THE SCREEN (NOT HOME IM NAKED AND NOT IN THE MOOD FOR RAPING NOW SO YEAH ANYWAY) MORAL; THE ORIGINAL NOT THE CULT MORAL CODE FUCK ASSHOLE OKAY? DO I SEEM LIKE I WANT A CULT? OR THAT I JUST WANT TO CHAINSAW THE HEAD OF YOUR DOG AND PACK IT IN A NICE GIFT BOX FOR YOU? HUUUUUH!?

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Learn how to say "I love you" in a different language, just to say it to the person you like and observe their dumbfounded expressions.

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Mix up "I'm starving," "I'm freezing," and "I have to pee," in my head, and then say them out loud the wrong way, in times of extreme starving/freezing/needing-to-pee desperation.

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Wishing you could go back in time and do a situation over again, becuase you regret the stuff you did.

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Before posting a comment when you need several consecutive tries to type the words in the box because the lettering is so damn hard to read. But your friend can do it in one try. He got the easy one.

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go though and like the posts with only one like so the person who wrote it doesn't feel alone.

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I think of unbelievably perverted things seconds before I am about to cum when masturbating.

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When in bed, I fold a small section of the covers in my hand to make a point and poke my fingers with it.

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When something funny happens think of it a couple days later than laugh,everyone then looks at me weirdly.

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Count how long it takes before you stop peeing.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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this is a terrible website and i hate you

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when someone is talking about something i have no idea of and then asked me if i agree I'm like: oh yes! and then promptly changing subject so they won't find out

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I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

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Take everything out of the fridge, and climb in it, and pretend your in a time capsule.

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Look at a word and count the letters by 2's - continue counting the letters over and over by 2's until it comes out even at the end of the word.

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I stop the microwave at 1 second so that one someone else uses it it beeps

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Go through funny pictures and memes on Facebook, and then accidently miss one and ten when you click to go back you have to go through like 5 more to get back to the one you want.

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R A P E Children

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Stay up late on the weekdays and go to bed early on the weekends ..... What is wrong with me?

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i randomly grab my boobs when i'm home alone. like, all the time.

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instinctively thumb down long posts without reading them.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.