Looking outside the window and imagining a huge explosion destroy everything and then u surviving and trying to find a way to survive

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Spend ages searching for a porno (normally about 40 minutes), search through it for the best bit, finish and think "what was the point of all that"

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during texting you set your phone in your lap right before a car is about to pass you so they dont see you texting and driving

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Your mom

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Tried to suck ur own penis

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Stop singing about weed when you see a cop car.

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Look an ugly person up and down and try to think of ways that they can improve how they look. ( clothing, hair, and makeup)

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Talking to yourself in your head so you don't seem so crazy.

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my favorite singer is Bles Bridges 22/07/1947-24/03/2000

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Sometime when I'm alone, I like to fill my bathtub with marinara sauce and pretend I'm a meatball.

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when u start laughing then start clapping and look like a seal

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Opens new book to random page. Reads snippet. Smiles to myself when I reach it 1 week later. -epsin

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I hate when my mom hangs my underwear on the clothesline outside.

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I wear my boxers so I can poop through the pee hole

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I imagine myself dying in the worst possible way more than once a day. I don't know...today, I was driving on a bridge and all I could picture was it collapsing and falling onto me, When I'm lying in bed, I imagine my ceiling fan toppling me.

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The last meal I have before I get on a plane - I think about how it is food in one city and will be crapped out in another.

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I kill Solid Snake and masturbate when the Game over screen keeps screaming for my own "snake" "Snake answer me! Snake SNAAAKE!" Me: Answer coming right up and out any moment now! fapfapfap

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Leftovers are better than the actual meal ;)

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Pee sitting down so I dont have to aim

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Feeling sorry for inanimate objects

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When I see a 20th Century Fox movie, I always sing the intro.

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think that the whole world is a dollhouse and we are being controlled by giant people above who live in a whole differnt world

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not be afraid of hurricane sandy

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When I step on something pokey, I don't say the quick "OW" that is expected, I go the extra syllable and a say "JOW!"

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.