always want to tell my friends the nightmares I had but they don't sound as horrible as they actually were spoken out loud and then get annoyed if their no tike 'OH my god! And what happened next...?'

I forget I turned the toaster on and jump when it goes off.

on hot summer days when I exit the shower I only dry off my legs to the point where they aren't dripping but my leg hair is still wet.

"I'll start tomorrow..." wake up and it has been a year later and I still haven't done it.

Smoking in the shower.

Singing alone in the car and then stopping, scared that there is an audio recorder in the car recording you singing.

When A situation Doesn't go how I wanted it to go, It annoys me so much I sometimes shit in my hands and clap.

I feel like my blanket is an indestructible shield against any monsters that might try to get me at night. If any part of you is out of the covers, you're screwed. lol -ML

when you say something and they go what? so you repeat it and they still didn't hear but once you say "forget it" they suddenly understood you perfectly.

Use head & "Shoulders" for pubic hair

wait up to 14 days just to find the opportunity to use one, really good, joke.

Daydream about doing unspeakable things(killing, raping, beating, cutting, shooting, ect.) to the person you hate

When I'm laying in bed in the dark and I close my eyes for a while then when I open them again I quickly scan for a light source just to make sure I can still see.

See someone walking or in their car driving then imaging what they're doing next or imagine the rest of their life.

Force a piss out really hard because you're in a rush.

Check your analog watch, wait for it to strike a minute, then look away and try to count 60 seconds out in your head before you look again. However many seconds you were away is your new record.

Try to balance the light switch between on and off.

after seeing toy story, and watching that toys moved and talked to each other when the humans werent around, thinking that toys are really like that when you gone, and when you go back to you room, the toys rush back into their spots.

The power to put a pointless super power on thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com

When I'm listening to a sad song that relates to my life while I'm walking all alone, I mouth the words and pretend I'm in a music video.

Sitting down in the shower

I twerk in the mirror to see how much my ass jiggles

Go into a card shop, laugh hysterically at the funny ones, then leave. Then whilst walking down the street, you think of them again and burst out laughing. This is highly embarrassing when you're alone!

I take a poop and then stand up to pee because I'm a man

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.