no magazine on toilet? read shampoo bottle

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When alone in a public restroom, after using the toilet I kick the lever and run away out of fear that it will splash on me.

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Call out the mistakes I see drivers make in front of me.

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Sometimes I think of doing really bad things and smirk, only to later regret even thinking of it and start questioning myself while feeling bad about it.

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Whenever I look in the bathroom mirror, I fear that I will see a terrible bloody monster standing behind me. I convince myself of this so completely that I panic and rush out right after I pee.

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every bite i have of a sandwich, i need to have a sip of a flavored drink to "soften the bread and make it taste good".

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Still record on VHS tapes.

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Do sex sensations feel exactly the same for the opposite sex.

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Having cool food in your house and knowing your boyfriend is going to call you around 6 or so, so you start eating said awesome food at about 5:57. That way when your boyfriend asks what you're doing to can tell him you're eating _____ and he'll want to come over.

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When I'm watching something or playing something and the character goes underwater, I hold my breath until the character reaches the surface. This is weird as hell, does anyone else do this?

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While going to sleep, you turn the pillow downside-up several times to find a cooler surface.

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Make sudden movements in the mirror to try and catch out my reflection.

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I sit in my sink and pretend that I am water.

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Think about breathing...

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When peeing at a urinal, move my stream back and forth the coat as much of the wall as I can.

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My hoodie/jacket strings HAVE to be equal in length, or I pull them then restretch the hood out to make them even.

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I set my alarm clock early just so I can get up snooze it.... One, two, three, maybe even four times.

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When walking outside by myselff and listening to music, I mouth the words and pretend im the singer of the song in their music video.

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think something you shouldn't, then stop thinking it, because someone might read your mind

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lie in bed, stare at the ceiling fan, focus on only one blade, and see how long your eyesight can follow it.

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See someone thats so hot all you can think about is seeing them naked all day.

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Wait until there is nobody in the bathroom and then fart really really loud. Also I flip my pillow every 10 minutes so my head is on the cold side. (try it some time)

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when i meet ppl i often think of them as if two other ppl i know had a baby even if they are the same sex.

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When eating chips/cereal (out of the box)/any small snacks I put an even amount in my mouth and divide them evenly on each side of my mouth and chew them like that.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.