Link gross things with porn i.e: Think of really gross things (or friends or family) when fapping to really hot stuff ( the porn becomes ruined)

When you sit down to use the toilet, start, and then realize that the window is open and people can hear you.You then either search for something to mask the sound or proceed to relieve yourself by making as little noise as possible (ultimately failing)

Call the ninja turtles by their full names.

When you fart in class but try to cover it up by moving around so other people think it was just the chair squeaking.

THINK OF SOMETHING WEIRD YOU DO TO PUT ON THIS WEBSITE ONLY TO END UP FORGETTING IT BEFORE YOU GET ON THE COMPUTER

Naming every pet you've ever owned Peter Jankins

I never read the Terms of Service. I just click "OK"

looking at the bottom when i meet foreigners talking among themselves... dang. no subtitles.

Get freaked out when door bell or phone rings when you are doing something you are not supposed to.

I put my finger in jars of jam/yoghurt/honey etc then lick the finger and repeat and hope nobody see's me.

I twist my pubes into little spikes when I pee.

Criticize a porn novel for its poor use of the English language

I'm not bad looking and I don't fall into the beautiful category either but I really feel good about the way I look

I say a word and it feels like it didnt roll off of my tongue right, so I keep mouthing the word and saying it quietly to myself or in my head. Then end up saying it loudly in affirmation, possibly more than once.

Rub a pen tip between my fingers.

I hit the frig after sex

You feel like someone can read your mind so you try not to think about stupid stuff.

Sometimes I wonder if I'm actually in a coma and that everything is just a dream and my parents are standing over me watching me and wishing their daughter was awake

Fake an orgasm after only 30 seconds, watch the "wtf" look on her face then laugh hysterically.

Until just recently, I thought apple juice was made by the pee of the company. Just that they added sugar.

I strum my fingers on my other hand between the fingers on the other hand which is a fist to make a popping sound (Try it, it's really fun)

try and open the microwave right before it finishes.

For some reason some guy at the office started calling me "Biggus Dickus" and that became my nickname from there on... ...Cant help but smirk whenever my female employees gather and ask one another "But what is that Biggus Dickus guys real name? Is he really "Biggus Dickus? Such a strange name, should we call him Biggus Dickus or? etc" Nero the clit collector: AND THEY WONDER WHY I REFUSE TO TELL THEM MY REAL NAME XD They even have bets to see which one can guess "Biggus Dickus`s" real name... ...WHAT? YOU COLLECT STAMPS! THATS TWICE AS CRUEL... Besides you got like ten, I got about 300.005.

Sometimes, when I'm at work, I j3rk 0ff in the bathroom. Please tell me someone else has done this????

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.