when someone mispronounces something I say the correct pronunciation quietly under my breath so it doesn't bother me

use the shower water running of my arms and hands to shoot off random hairs inside the shower

Remembering that you're breathing and then it stops being subconscious so you have to purposely breathe until you stop thinking about it.

Put my hand under the pillow in bed to get orgasm

Only read the shortest sentences on "Things You Think Only You Do". More than 2 sentences I skip.

Think that If I leave a big knife out on the counter- or a pair of tights/belt/scarf out in view, I believe that ultimately someone will break in and kill me via the aforementioned items.................and I will only have myself to blame.

When you're lying in bed and you fart, you pull the covers over your head to smell it.

sometimes, i smell my own farts.

The longer it takes me to find the light switch in the dark the more frantic and terrified I become.

Randomly think odd scenarios in your head and say if that happened this is what i would do and then forget about it the next day

Open a new google tab when someone walks in the room, even if I wasn't looking at anything bad.

Stare at people until they notice, and when they notice watch them out of the corner of your eye until they turn.. and then you continue staring

Imagine yourself and friends as band members while listening to songs.

Laugh softly when you hear someone else cry

Whenever I'm holding two round objects, I try to juggle them.

Counting down on a digital clock, trying to say "0" just as the time changes.

saying long strings of unconnected words in your head and wondering if you just said something that noone else ever has

working out escape routes for each room in your house when you're alone, just in case

Lay down in bed and get comfortable and then realize you have to pee.

When you are almost crying while laughing in a silent area, you have to think terrible thoughts just to get rid of the laughing.

When you lie in bed and imagine scenarios that will never happen.

Search "sex" whenever you see a dictionary.

I eat one way in public and another way in private.

I hump my bed at night and pretend it's a hot model

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.