Make jokes about yourself on the period: "dear god, this is the 5th day I`m bleeding and I`m sill not dead. What kind of monster am I?" ...not funny... :)

When I am talking about someone, I check my phone to make sure it hasn't dialed them and to make sure they aren't listening.

If I'm walking across a road and a car stops to allow me to pass, I say 'Thank you' even though I know full well they cannot hear me.

Whenever I go to the toilet on an airplane I worry that during the time I'm there the plane will drop out the sky.

You think about all the stupid things you did in elementary school and avoid anyone who went to your elementary school in high school.

taking your t shirt or sweatshirt off quickly so nothing gets you while its over your face

Stop singing about weed when you see a cop car.

Naming every pet you've ever owned Peter Jankins

forget i left the light on somewhere in the house and when i see it on i think a ghost did it..

When I look at a digital clock, i try to rearrange the number to make them a math equation

hearing the opening theme music to Disney or 20th Century Fox or whatever and knowing what it is before you see the screen, then wondering if you should feel proud or if your a weird geek.

Peeing in the shower

I hit the frig after sex

After eating a sandwich, eat the leftover sesame seeds one-by-one.

Wonder why there are sites like this.

lie in bed, stare at the ceiling fan, focus on only one blade, and see how long your eyesight can follow it.

Not vote up my own posts? I bet I'm among the few..

watch reality t.v. when you're feeling guilty and think to yourself "at least I'm not as bad as that"

shit corn, even though i havent recently eaten corn.

Get bored of regular porn and watch some bestiality just for the variation.

Click my teeth from side to side at the beat of songs

Wondering what would happen if you did something super random or inappropriate in a group setting. :)

When I'm over at my friends house and they get in a fight with their sibling, I just pet their dog.

Wipe the salt off your hand on your right pant leg after eating salty fries from fast food restaurants.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.