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Think about the things you could do with you had the power to stop the time.
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-33
Before I go to sleep, I imagine what it would be like dating a really hot actor or singer and think of dramatic scenarios that could happen.
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-72
Putting salt on dry toast, yum!
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-10
I like to lather my entire body with Nutella and put paper in my hands and stand there acting like a tree.
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-130
smoke marijuana
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-62
get embarrassed when someone is in the public bathroom, and your shit makes a splash in the toilet
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-28
Invented a special password for yourself in order to recognize yourself if travel through time.
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+10
Sometimes I feel that my reflection in the mirror will stop doing what I'm doing and either jump out and grab me, start telling me about her reflected life, or give me a mission to free her from her mirror life.
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+35
I always have to know exactly what time it is before I go to sleep, just so I can figure out exactly how many hours of sleep I will get.
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-16
Wonder what I would have said to my dad if I knew he was going to die
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+8
Ask someone "what" when they tell you something even though you heard them clearly
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+37
get home from work and masturbate instantly
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-31
I choose not to post a comment on some subjects because I know there will be a hundred others that will be the same.
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-36
I hit the frig after sex
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+5
Sometimes when I'm sitting next to someone I start thinking stuff about him/her, making fun of their clothes in my mind or something. Then I have a feeling that maybe that person can read thoughts and immediately start thinking about something else, and avoid eye contact until one of use leaves
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+7
I brush my teeth in the shower and use the shower for a waterpik.
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-43
When the wind is blowing like crazy, I pretend I am the god who controls it.
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-70
A mix of Slenderman and Herobrine would be the ideal husband for me. >:)
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+22
What do you call a rapist in your house? Your father.
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-72
When something you're sat on makes a noise that sounds like a FART. So you try and do the noise again, to make sure people are aware that the noise was the chair and not you!
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-2
When I'm getting shouted out i blur my eyes and think of something else :3
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-108
Every time I walk up the stairs in my own house, I feel compelled to do it on all fours.
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-55
Have to suddenly poop while shopping (mainly in Wal-Mart), but don't feel like traveling far to the restroom. So I kneel down in whatever aisle I'm in, casually shove my heel up my butt, and pick up some random item from the shelf and pretend to be interested in it. Finally, when the poop is secure in my butt, I'll put the item back and continue my shopping.
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-53
I read your stuff at the interwebs and think "sons, I am disappoint" Moral: Lol, I just might be your father you know... But that does not mean you disappoint me anymore, I kinda expect your worst? Best? I mean... Are you doing your worst on purpose? WOW!
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-53
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Things You Think Only You Do
A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.