When I'm home alone at night I check around the corners to make sure there isn't anyone there

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When I'm drinking something, I slosh the glass back and forth a long with my head to try and get what I'm drinking into my mouth.

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Peel my mandarin oranges in one try

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Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

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Think what would I be doing if I was someone else

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Making gang signs out the window when your parents let you ride in the front seat

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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a hardon and make people think it's that big all time.

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getting really nervous about random white vans that drive by you.

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When you walk across a cross walk and you stretch your steps so it takes one step for each line, yet you still try to look casual because ur in public

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send a text to some one and act like you "meant" to send it to someone else.

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Being fat

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Imagine myself going back in time and giving my friends and family little hints on how their life will pan out.

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Know almost every line from spongbob episodes.

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After getting up from the grass, I use my foot to move the grass I was sitting on around so that there isn't a butt print in the grass.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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I get mad at women because they menstruate and that's gross. I don't judge one woman individually for it, but I'm disgusted with the whole gender, which leads to being almost disgusted with myself for being attracted to them.

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You see someone do something cool and imagine doing it in front of all your friends

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I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

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Talking to yourself in your head so you don't seem so crazy.

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Run faster down hotel corridors.

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Press harder on the remote when I know the batteries are dead.

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When you are outside, you see a small shadow moving across the ground. You think it's a ball someone threw, so you look up to catch it, only to realize it is a bird.

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When in a room by myself and I hear someone coming to walk into the room I'm in, I feel an overwhelming urge to hide behind the door so they don't see me first.

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When I Download A Song Or Movie And The Download Speed Slows Down I Think The FBI Is Tracking Me.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.