I am 23 and I know how to spell "STORK"

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after taking a dump i always still smell a little bit of poop and i wonder if other people smell it too

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Sometimes when I kill a bug, i wrap it up in a giant wad of paper towels, put it in a plastic sandwich bag, THEN throw it away. just in case...

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I have an irrational fear of automatic flushing toilets.

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I have tried jumping in an airplane to see if I fall in the same spot

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Sleeping with one leg under the blanket and one out.

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Only use the left earphone.

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Being fat

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Scratch inside my ear, then lick the finger I used.

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Make calculations with house number. Eg: House nº 112 means house nº 4

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When I watch porn, I only watch like the first 5-10 minutes of it. To be honest I wonder why people bother making them longer too.

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Everytime aplane is flying low you think it's going to crash right in front of your eyes

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Thinking you're very popular after you have owned someone at school.

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I get mad at women because they menstruate and that's gross. I don't judge one woman individually for it, but I'm disgusted with the whole gender, which leads to being almost disgusted with myself for being attracted to them.

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I really hate the sound of sqeaking balloons

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Flush the toilet before you finish peeing.

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While at the movies, grab and eat your popcorn with your tongue and pretend you are a lizard.

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right after I turn the shower off I jump up and down to get rid of the extra water all over me...

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try to make myself sneeze because I like the feeling I get when I do

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When you see someone you know in a shopping centre and you pretend that you didnt see them at all because you cant be bothered striking up a conversation.

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Go to bed with my left nostril clogged, wake up with my right nostril clogged.

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Get scared of the dark while in bed, so you make sure all limbs are tucked nice and tight under the covers. Once done, you now feel safe..

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I can understand (insert language) but for the life of me I can't speak it.

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i absolutely hate the number nine, and when i told my brother this i was like "sometimes i wish i could delete the number 9" and hes like "but then youd have 9 numbers" and i was like..... "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.