expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

Believing in the kindness of strangers

after i take a poop i stand up turn around and piss on my poop to try to split it in half

When I post a picture on a Horsehead Huffer site that I made on Microsoft Paint, and it ends up being one of those that never load, I go back on Paint and save it again. Then I repost it, and it works.

Having to poop in a certain way to avoid your ass sucking it in again. If it all comes out in one go, the cleaning becomes a lot easier and more satisfying.

Looking up your teachers on facebook just to look at their photos

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GLENDA!!!

When you don't have enough money for something, you just take a tiny bit of money from your siblings and parents room at a time so they don't notice any different

I pee in the sink so i don't have to aim

Thinking you're very popular after you have owned someone at school.

Laying in bed at a friends place with your eyes closed imaging where you would end up if you got up and went to the toilet as if it was your own house.

Put my hands together the 'other' way

see if I can hold my breath when walking down a long hallway

When I get "interactive" commercials on my laptop screen, I like to "just shoot 4 out of 5 ducks" and feel like I have cheated the system.

Sometimes I feel that my reflection in the mirror will stop doing what I'm doing and either jump out and grab me, start telling me about her reflected life, or give me a mission to free her from her mirror life.

Intentionally utilize uncommon vocabulary to replace colloquial slang for the pure purpose of entertainment (for oneself). :D

Flush the toilet before you finish peeing.

When you are outside, you see a small shadow moving across the ground. You think it's a ball someone threw, so you look up to catch it, only to realize it is a bird.

Get somewhat worried about myself if I'm thumbed down on THIS SITE.

feel like your calculator is judging/making fun of you for looking up simple equations

Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

Think that some minutes feel shorter than others

You always go to the corner of the shower when the cold water is running.

I randomly hold my boobs in my room.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.