watch lesbian porn instead of normal because you hate have other men in the picture

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in burgers, you eat until you have only a few bites left, then you eat the bun and then the insides

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when you've done everything you wanted to do on the internet and stop and just stare at the screen.

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i absolutely hate the number nine, and when i told my brother this i was like "sometimes i wish i could delete the number 9" and hes like "but then youd have 9 numbers" and i was like..... "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"

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Save more than once on your favourite game.

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Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

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right click refresh on desktop. Repeat

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I try to not step on the lines on the sidewalk

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I have a band in my head that performs for me every time I listen to music.

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I pee on the bathroom sink everytime, because I am lazy to open the toilet, even when I visit other people, sorry friends and family =)

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Being in the car and wondering if your parents can read your mind so you think "If you can here me cough in 3, 2, 1..." Sometimes my dad actually does it and he looks back at me and smiles. .-.

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When I have my headphones in, and I'm miming the words to a song in the bathroom pretending that I'm playing a gig. I put the tap on to make sure no one hears me dancing.

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When someone close to me sadly passes on and later when I am listening to the radio if I hear a song that sounds suitable to that moment I kind of make that our song if that makes sense to any of you

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When I fart in public, I always pretend that nothing ever happened.

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Scratching with the wife's/girlfriends hair brush.

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Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

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I still put my thumb in my mouth, BUT only because I like the feel of putting my eye lashes under my fingernails and my thumb inconveniantly fits in my mouth. Now I know I'm the only person in the world who does this. I'm trying to drop the habit. But it feels so GOOD!

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Rub a pen tip between my fingers.

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I don't use my car air conditioning because I think it's wasteful and it might "run-out" when I'm REALLY, REALLY hot.

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I still hum songs that I made up when I was a little kid

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I hold my breath in elevators

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When home alone and you hear a noise getting out a gun/weapon.

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For some reason some guy at the office started calling me "Biggus Dickus" and that became my nickname from there on... ...Cant help but smirk whenever my female employees gather and ask one another "But what is that Biggus Dickus guys real name? Is he really "Biggus Dickus? Such a strange name, should we call him Biggus Dickus or? etc" Nero the clit collector: AND THEY WONDER WHY I REFUSE TO TELL THEM MY REAL NAME XD They even have bets to see which one can guess "Biggus Dickus`s" real name... ...WHAT? YOU COLLECT STAMPS! THATS TWICE AS CRUEL... Besides you got like ten, I got about 300.005.

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RE:" pee on the side of the toilet" you dont pee on the side of the toilet so it isn't loud. you pee on the side so it doesn't splash on you're legs as much.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.