Sometimes I turn on my bedroom fan at night just so i can use heavier blankets.

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Before going to the bathroom, check behind the shower curtains for serial killers.

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Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

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Sometimes when I fart while sitting down, I lift one leg up.

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I still hum songs that I made up when I was a little kid

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Click an invisible pen I think is in my hand but is not constantly everyday.

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Get extremly pissed off when everyone on youtube thinks that only guys use the website and call you "dude" , "bro" or "sir" when they respond to a comment you posted -_-

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eat cake in a bowl with milk the way you would eat a bowl of cereal

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When at a restaurant you practice your order inside your head, then when you actually have to order you mess it up.

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I have to stop the Microwave on 0 but before it beeps or I'm not going to get what I want in life. OCD MUCH

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after taking a dump i always still smell a little bit of poop and i wonder if other people smell it too

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Paranoid someone is reading your mind, so you think something weird to see if they look at you

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Have one of those days where you think it is just a dream but then reality takes over

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Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

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I get really annoyed by the constant audience laughter in some tv shows even when nothing funny is said

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I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

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Put the porn sound in a really low volume even when you have headphones, just to make sure noone can hear it. Then take off the headphones once in a while to check if it sounds too loud.

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expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

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carry my cat by holding it's front and back legs

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Somethings thinking: O God, I love this world.

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So has anyone else ever been in the middle of doing something and at the exact moment something happens and you sort of wonder if it happened because of what you did.

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When I was little I used to cover myself all the way up and put pillows around me, then ask my sister if she could see me, trying to be invisible when I sleep just in case someone breaks into my house at night.

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I **** with no hands.

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scratch that bit between my balls and arse when it gets itchy, then carry on scratching for ages cos it feels so damn good

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.