Use my phone to see what time it is

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When I hear footsteps approaching while I'm sitting on the toilet, I'm getting ready to jump at the door in case I actually forgot to lock it.

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get happy as sh*t when you remember your homework is do after your lunch period so you can do it then, but never end up doing it.

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When I'm making a weird face, I remind my self to stop before it gets stuck like that.

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When the good guy in a movie is in a bad situation, I imagine myself doing something different that seems more legit.

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A lot of times I believe things I see or things that happen are "signs" of something.

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Think that some minutes feel shorter than others

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Spread my butt so poop comes out easier.

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I hold my breath in elevators

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When I was a kid and I misbehaved when my dad used to smack me I would put emphasis in my cries to let him think that I got the lesson.

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Sometimes at a red light, I like to look at the person driving next to me and if they look towards me I quickly turn around and pretend I wasn't looking at them.

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Everytime my sibling starts a sentance with "I remember when","I have an idea"etc.,I get up and walk out.

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Click an invisible pen I think is in my hand but is not constantly everyday.

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Have one of those days where you think it is just a dream but then reality takes over

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I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

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Sometimes when I look in the mirror I act out a scene like Tyra banks coming up to me and asking me to be on America's next top model.

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Try to move your head to line up specks on the windshield with objects outside.

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When I was younger I used to think that Red bull was a drink that really did give you wings like they show in the commercials

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Think of all the perverted and disgusting things that I'd like to do to the women at work then feel bad for being a vile and disgusting person, then kind of feel turned on anyway lol.

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When I'm walking I look up at nothing in particular and it causes everyone else to look up too!

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getting excited when you find a recycled tissue in your robe/sweatshirt so you don't know have to get up to get one yourself?

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sometimes when i wipe my nose a booger will get on my hand then ill get to lazy to get it off and wipe it under my chair.

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Pretending I'm on my cellphone in public.

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You are thinking of really awkward moments that happened earlier in the day so then you subconsciously say a bunch of random things quickly out loud to get the thought of the awkward moment out of your head.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.