Having to poop in a certain way to avoid your ass sucking it in again. If it all comes out in one go, the cleaning becomes a lot easier and more satisfying.

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after i take a poop i stand up turn around and piss on my poop to try to split it in half

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So has anyone else ever been in the middle of doing something and at the exact moment something happens and you sort of wonder if it happened because of what you did.

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Write angry notes into your search browser in case any Russian spies are watching.

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When passed by a very attractive girl in the street, turn around and look after her and/or follow her to the next street corner, in order to grasp more of her beauty.

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When you don't have enough money for something, you just take a tiny bit of money from your siblings and parents room at a time so they don't notice any different

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Write a word then wonder if it's spelt with an i or and e so just put them both in but do it in such a way that the person reading it won't know whether you didn't know the spelling or misspelled it then realized your mistake and tried to fix it.

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I blow my nose in my towel after i dry off. Then use the same towel the next day. lol

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I **** with no hands.

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When someone wants to kill a bug, I'll get insane and catch the bug, then run out and release the bug while saying "NOW YOU'RE FREE!!!!!"

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scratch that bit between my balls and arse when it gets itchy, then carry on scratching for ages cos it feels so damn good

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When you're scared of the bathroom and you close your eyes you quickly look around to check if there's a monster or something in the mirror

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Sometimes I wait a long time to pee when I really have to go. It feels good.

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If someone high fives me on one hand, I need to high five the other one too, or I feel uneven.

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masturbate as soon as the opportunity arrises. "You'll be home alone all day" "Ok, bye.....*fap fap fap*"

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Sometimes I accidentally move my mouth in a way where it suddenly makes a random farting noise so I immediately just make more obviously made fart noises just so people wont think I actually farted. Is that only me?

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Hate when people ask "do you have a bathroom?" It's like "no we crap in the yard!"

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always get sports injuries, never get any attention from them

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I scratch and sniff.

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Run into a wall and say "I'm sorry" and then realize that it's just a wall.

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When playing a game you refer to the kid you don't know as "kid" - ar2

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play Simpsons episodes in my head...way too often

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Can't stop tears from comeing to your eyes when singing

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i leave tv on when i sleep...cant close it cause i hate to hear....noices...in my bedroom that cant identify......

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.