worry about getting a little butt sweat mark on a chair if you've been sitting in it too long while its hot.

Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away

Walking into a room to do something, and then forgetting what you were gonna do.

If I get lost while driving, the first thing I do is turn down the radio.

make it a point of interest to know every word to a song that nobody likes. (i.e. call me maybe) >.>

Constantly refresh your email page even though you know nothing will appear.

Sometimes I accidentally move my mouth in a way where it suddenly makes a random farting noise so I immediately just make more obviously made fart noises just so people wont think I actually farted. Is that only me?

whenever i'm holding a kitchen knife, i feel super weird like i'm gonna stab someone.... its not like i would ever do that, but i think about what would happen if i just impaled the person that is standing near me with a huge knife.

I put a cigarette lighter in a fireplace, anyone else?

Have to have a certain light in the bathroom to poop. Also, nobody can be anywhere near me.

Stab myself on a daily basis

I hit the frig after sex

When I can't find my phone so I panic and shearch everywhere only to find out it was in my pocket.

Sleep with pillow between legs

Sing along to the radio in the car then stop at a red light when you realize other people can see you more easily.

When you Saigon the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.

Turn off light in bed... notice something you haven't seen before. IT'S SLENDERMAN You turn the light back on and realized it was a lamp

in burgers, you eat until you have only a few bites left, then you eat the bun and then the insides

watch lesbian porn instead of normal because you hate have other men in the picture

Save more than once on your favourite game.

Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

right click refresh on desktop. Repeat

I try to not step on the lines on the sidewalk

I pee on the bathroom sink everytime, because I am lazy to open the toilet, even when I visit other people, sorry friends and family =)

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.