A mix of Slenderman and Herobrine would be the ideal husband for me. >:)

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Sometimes I accidentally move my mouth in a way where it suddenly makes a random farting noise so I immediately just make more obviously made fart noises just so people wont think I actually farted. Is that only me?

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I wonder what it wonder be like to have a really tall girlfriend?

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feel like your calculator is judging/making fun of you for looking up simple equations

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Hate when people ask "do you have a bathroom?" It's like "no we crap in the yard!"

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Invented a special password for yourself in order to recognize yourself if travel through time.

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I hit the frig after sex

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When standing in long lines (stores, banks etc..) I think about how other people would react if I puked all over the place with no warning.

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Thinking that out there, on this earth in a lost city, there is an awesome clone of you.

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I never take drinks into smelly places, out of fear that the smell will somehow get into my drink and contaminate the taste.

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When watching TV shows, I always think about what I would have done differently if I was the character in that particular situation.

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Tryng to run away from, or at least be faster than my shadow.

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A lot of times I believe things I see or things that happen are "signs" of something.

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Look into your neighbor's house and halucinate someone watching back

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never wanting to poop in other houses. You have to use your toilet

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Can't stop tears from comeing to your eyes when singing

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Whe someone buys you a gift and you think they have installed a camera into it or can somehow mentally see you when that gift is near you. Resulting in you acting strange around that it or when you are present in the same room as that gift

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When you need something from someone and you forget what it's called,So then you have to awkwardly explain it.

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while I am sitting on the toilet I play with it and waste the toilet paper and of course i just keep flushing it

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Opening the fridge door, then trying to accomplish pouring a drink, before the door seals itself forever leaving the cola to the mercy of the outside world.

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I hold my breath in elevators

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Accidentally scratching a surface and then scratching it again with the tops of your fingernails to even it out.

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Justin Beiber is a woman

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sometimes I can be really tired but when I go to bed I lie there for hours awake

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.