Until just recently, I thought apple juice was made by the pee of the company. Just that they added sugar.

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Try to find the perfect stride length so you don't have to walk all weird to avoid stepping on a sidewalk crack. Fail miserably but keep walking weird.

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Write b as d and d as b or p as q and q as p. I mostly write b as d and d as b since I've learned the alphabet. Trying not to do that now

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Waiting with a friend the microwave countdown finish and when comes to 0 shout "Happy New Year!" and we hug each other

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Thinking something embarrassing, then having to talk to someone and suddenly getting worried you are about to blurt out your thoughts

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I used to think that if the earth was completely smoothed flat and you had a really powerful telescope if you looked through it you would see yourself looking through the telescope.

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Whenever I got hurt I used to just run like that would stop the pain

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I think Frozen is an overrated film

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Have one of those days where you think it is just a dream but then reality takes over

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While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

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Drive slow in straightaways and fast through curves, especially sharp ones.

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Sometimes I wonder how food tastes when not drowned in ketchup.

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HAPPY BIRTHDAY GLENDA!!!

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I blow my nose in my towel after i dry off. Then use the same towel the next day. lol

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I prefer to go to the bathroom with the door open.

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I used to shower with my cat which struggles like hell, even though it loves getting fucking filthy, one day it even bit my dick. I still shower with my cat.

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When I was little I used to cover myself all the way up and put pillows around me, then ask my sister if she could see me, trying to be invisible when I sleep just in case someone breaks into my house at night.

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You see someone do something cool and imagine doing it in front of all your friends

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Laying in bed at a friends place with your eyes closed imaging where you would end up if you got up and went to the toilet as if it was your own house.

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If someone high fives me on one hand, I need to high five the other one too, or I feel uneven.

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Read things from this page and think to self: "Thank God, I thought I was the only one."

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Sniff or tap to a rhythm to some sort of beat I composed in my head...

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Say something smart in class, then worry your friends will rip ony uo for it half way through saying it, so end it by saying "or something like that."

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When I Download A Song Or Movie And The Download Speed Slows Down I Think The FBI Is Tracking Me.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.