I really enjoy self-pity.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I have one of those automatic shower cleaners. After I press the button, it beeps 15 times before starting. I have to get out my brush, get out the hair dryer, plug it in, and Turin it on before the 15th beep. Every time.

thumb_up thumb_down -56

If a donkey and a angle fish where to pro create what would be the out come? They can't mate a donkeys a mammal and a angle fish is a fish

thumb_up thumb_down +45

I constantly try to turn something I say into my catch phrase.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

you wonder if things look the same through other peoples eyes

thumb_up thumb_down +94

On the bus think in your mind "I know you're reading my mind right now," and look for reactions.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

hallo

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Say a word I just learned over and over again until it loses meaning.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

I have to fart real bad but people are around me , so I try to silent fart

thumb_up thumb_down -84

Not doing any work Feel guilty about it Then still do no work

thumb_up thumb_down -98

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

thumb_up thumb_down -104

when i'm in the shower and i close my eyes, i thnk something's gonna be there to scare me when i open my eyes again.

thumb_up thumb_down +133

Seperate your food on you dinner plate

thumb_up thumb_down -61

pick your nose and eat it

thumb_up thumb_down -111

I stick one foot out of my blanket so I'm not hot or cold.

thumb_up thumb_down -159

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

thumb_up thumb_down -56

Always think "what if ghosts really ARE everywhere?" when I'm naked in the shower, or getting dressed, or any other private and/or embarrassing moment. Then get really freaked out and picture 6 people from 1902 watching you.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

when you bleed you suck your own blood

thumb_up thumb_down -13

whenever I lost a tooth my parents would while I slept they would sprinkle caster sugar on the window sill and make footprints in it (tiny footprints)

thumb_up thumb_down -61

Pretend that when you are in the shower, the shower head is a giant machine gun, that takes thousands of men to operate, and that you were an extremely large person and you catch ALL of the bullets in your mouth, spitting them at the shower head while at the same time turning off the water as if they all died, and the small drips that continue to drop out were the dead soldires' blood.....-dillon

thumb_up thumb_down +70

When I'm watching a youtube video, I worry about how much time is left because I'm concerned the video maker won't wrap it up in time before the video ends.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Lick my cell phone screen to clean it.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Whenever I look in the bathroom mirror, I fear that I will see a terrible bloody monster standing behind me. I convince myself of this so completely that I panic and rush out right after I pee.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

I scrape the scum off my teeth with my fingernail and then I eat it.

thumb_up thumb_down +88

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.