Sometimes I reflexively say "ouch" when I drop an inanimate object and I'm not even hurt.

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When taking a shit, I get freaked out in case I get teleported to a place with lots of people by a scientist from the future or something.

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Whenever we watch a movie or stupid educational film in school, I sleep.

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Suck up stuff with the vacuum you know you shouldn't because your too lazy to pick it up.

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Get my belt loop caught on the door handle,

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Whenever I'm home alone, I listen to songs from my culture like Ella Ella, Taboo, or Sexy Robotica by Don Omar or other fun dancing songs, super loud and dance crazy and sing along as loud as I can. Any one else?

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when you are pooping you fart and it scares you a little bit.

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im going to rape that girl

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Breathe.

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I type things i really want to say to people and then delete them straight away because im too chicken to say it.

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Get turned on lookin at my own butt

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Going to a friends house for the weekend, coming home and checking the fridge/pantry for new foods.

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Handing something to a friend or someone and all you can think is "...I've fapped with that hand. And they know I have" even though you clean up after you feel like your jizz is gonna be on what you gave them and theyll find out amd think you're disgusting.

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When I'm watching an episode of a show that I've seen before with a friend, I say a part that is coming up ahead and act like I guessed.

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Say a word over and over until it sounds weird

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fap

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Laugh quietly to myself in public then cough to make the laugh seem like a it was a cough so people won't think I'm weird.

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Laugh harder when trying to explain what you are laughing about

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always picture someone naked even though sometime you really don't want to.

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masturbate... with condoms and gloves because male genitalia is gross and clean up takes just a few seconds rather than minutes

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Clicking the thumbs up or down when two of the submissions have the same number of thumbs up and think i'm the chosen one.

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Eat something that will make crumbs over the sink because you are too lazy to get a plate

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When eating chips/cereal (out of the box)/any small snacks I put an even amount in my mouth and divide them evenly on each side of my mouth and chew them like that.

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Think I'm going to fall down when I step onto an esculator that's not moving.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.