Closing your eyes and covering your ears when you think someone is going to throw up.

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When I'm home alone, turning the TV on so it's not so quiet

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I prefer to masturbate by putting a fleshlight under my stuffed-toy smurfette's dress and pretend to smurf her.

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A stranger makes me mad. Spend all day thinking about badass things that I should have done/said.

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When telemarketers call I speak Afrikaans to them until they hang up

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When I'm doing a spelling test, I spell a word and read it over and over again until it loses its meaning.

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Open Fridge, look around for few seconds, say to self - 'What the f*** am I doing?'

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When I am bored, I imagine saving my crush' s life and we live happily ever after. :( what an idiot I am

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Drinking and dialing people I dated.

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On YouTube, if someone comments a time in the video (or in the description) I always click it for fun, even if it doesn't work. Like if someone comments "it's 4:12 right now" on a 2 minute video I click the link.

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when my parents are gone i shout random stuff

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I walk down the stairs sideways because I'm afraid something will get me.

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Sleep with one leg on top of the covers and the rest of your body under them.

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I like to create stories and adventures in my head to make reality a little less boring...

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I pee in the water of the toilet to make bubbles

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I use chopsticks or disposable latex gloves to eat sandwiches, chocolate, basically any finger food, because in my opinion, it's impossible to get that greasy, sticky film off my fingers.

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Wish that Mexicans would go fix things in their own country instead of coming here unwelcome and demanding things instead.

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I click that I have read the Terms of Service although I haven't read sheit

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When I hear the doorbell ringing and I'm not expecting anyone, I turn off the tv/music and try not to make any sound, so they think there's no one home.

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Turn on the faucet and/or fan when using the toilet at someone else's house or at my own place when there is a visitor because I don't want them to hear me peeing.

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Ever dreamt of being naked and then waking up in horror.

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take 30 pictures and only find 1 where you dont look like shit

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When I forget to brush my teeth, scrape off the plaque on my teeth with my fingernail.

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when u start laughing then start clapping and look like a seal

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.