When telemarketers call I speak Afrikaans to them until they hang up

Thinking about how fast you blink and how many times you have blinked. You then start blinking too much because you are thinling about yourself blinking, and you try to stop, but you can't stop thinking about it.

Type in 'things you thought only you did' and find this site. Then smile stupidly and click thumbs up everytime you read something you thought only you did.

Know you have enough milk in your cereal when you start to see it peek through the cracks

Try to put in USB drive into computer, and no matter what, always ends up trying to put it in upside-down the first time.

I don't like to sit with my back to the door incase someone or something sneeks up behind me, it's even worse with headphones on.

Fake a yawn to see if other people will yawn back.

I look at my phone screen when i'm in an uncomfortable situation, and five minutes later i have to look again cause somebody asks what time it is.

While watching a movie, I imagine that same movie in my mind only replacing the characters with different ones from other series or videogames that I like. It just seems to make the movie better.

When a lot if people are yelling at me / disagreeing with me all at once, I start laughing.

I turn on the faucet or turn up the radio in the bathroom so maybe no one can hear me pee.

See someone thats so hot all you can think about is seeing them naked all day.

Have a fantasy where Jesus Christ is jackhammering Mickey Mouse in the doo-doo hole with a lawn dart while Garth Brooks gives birth to something resembling a cheddar cheese log with almonds on Santa Claus's tummy-tum.

Randomly flexing random muscles after long time of sitting at the computer

I like to poo while smoking.

"I'll start tomorrow..." wake up and it has been a year later and I still haven't done it.

When I climb into bed every night, I always say, "Bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed," while shifting until I am comfortablely settled. -Ikka

I mustn't step on the cracks in the pavement

When the adverts come on I forget what I'm watching and so spend five minutes trying to remember.

Ever dreamt of being naked and then waking up in horror.

Ask someone "what" when they tell you something even though you heard them clearly

A bee flies into your classroom and you're too terrified to focus on anything else.

get annoyed by people singing a song only to show off their brilliant voice and automatically think that they cannot sing as good as they think they can

I have an irrational fear of automatic flushing toilets.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.