When watching a video or listening to music, take earbuds out four or five times in repetition to make sure that no one can hear the audio but you, then check them again when someone comes within twenty feet of you. Then, spend the rest of the time feeling awkward and expecting someone to jump out of the bushes and take a video of that idiot with the defective headphones.

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I ejaculate fire and glory

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"Hey, did you see that new episode last night?" "Yeah!" "Do you remember that part when he ran through the city?" "Yeah!" LIES

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I sometimes rub my scalp rapidly and watch my dandruff fall down like snow.

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popping the lenses out of 3D glasses and wearing them when your doing homework or studying because it makes you feel smarter.

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I pick my nose n eat it. I love the hard ones

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You laugh to yourself when you think you are alone in a street but then you notice somebody in a car looking at you.

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When I'm crying i look in the mirror to see what i look like while I'm crying

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When peeing, if I get pee on the seat I will flush the toilet before wiping it and then see if I can quickly wipe it and toss the toilet paper in the toilet before it finishes flushing.

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I'm so afraid of using words incorrectly that I look up any word I'm not sure that I'm using properly before typing it into wherever I'll use it. If the definition is too vague, I abandon the word and try something else.

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wonder how old the people r who right these. im 12

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avoid going in the handicap bathroom stall because you're afraid someone will see you cause it's so big

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when i was a kid, i lookup dirty words in the english dictionary as substitute for porn :(

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Don't have to poop for a week until I get in the shower

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shag your mom

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hold my shirt with my chin when i'm peeing.

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go to the bathroom, turn on the hot water, get undressed so that the water has time to heat up

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Whenever I slurp from a straw I do it a little bit at a time, slowly and steadily so people don't turn at me and give me an annoyed face.

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Fart when i'm alone RIGHT before someone walks in... try to talk over the smell...

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use cleverbot to chat to automated dating chat bots. even if i don't understand swedish.

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When I fart I immediately go 'Eww. Who farted? That's gross'. And I blame it on someone else, always works :)

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When ever I touch something a certain way I have to touch it again exactly like I did the first time

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use my phone as an alarm clock for waking up. but sets the time in PM instead of AM.

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Go back to the song if I don't here what they sang Kay

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.