When I forget to brush my teeth, scrape off the plaque on my teeth with my fingernail.

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If I'm walking in the mall and realize I'm going in the wrong direction, I can't just double back, 'cause everyone would think I'm dumb for going in the wrong direction. Instead, I perform a slow U-turn to the other side of the walkway; either that or pretend to get an important text/phone call that forces me to do the quick turnaround. SAVE!

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hold my shirt with my chin when i'm peeing.

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I mustn't step on the cracks in the pavement

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I click that I have read the Terms of Service although I haven't read sheit

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When Im bored in a house that has leafy/floral wallpaper I follow the stem with my finger all the way up to the top of the wall and then go back down again and think of a route that gets you all the way to the other side of the wall.

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avoid going in the handicap bathroom stall because you're afraid someone will see you cause it's so big

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Sometimes I just space out for a period of time and completely forget that I'm breathing. Then when I snap out of it, I kind of breathe deeply because I thought I forgot to breathe.

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use the restroom at a different floor/building when taking a dump at work.

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When I hear the doorbell ringing and I'm not expecting anyone, I turn off the tv/music and try not to make any sound, so they think there's no one home.

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Ever dreamt of being naked and then waking up in horror.

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take 30 pictures and only find 1 where you dont look like shit

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I'm so afraid of using words incorrectly that I look up any word I'm not sure that I'm using properly before typing it into wherever I'll use it. If the definition is too vague, I abandon the word and try something else.

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Whenever I'm throwing trash down the garbage chute or into a dumpster, I all of the sudden am terrified that I accidentally threw out a valuable ring/my cell phone with the trash.

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Instead of having a nasty breaking up, I just disappear.

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My goal is to get as much as possible thumbs down at this post.

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Wasting a whole bunch of time trying to find how to make one and realizing it was at the top and that you forgot what you were going to put in the first place.

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Turn on the faucet and/or fan when using the toilet at someone else's house or at my own place when there is a visitor because I don't want them to hear me peeing.

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when my parents are gone i shout random stuff

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I have seen one of my submissions listed under "Quotes from other sites"

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"Hey, did you see that new episode last night?" "Yeah!" "Do you remember that part when he ran through the city?" "Yeah!" LIES

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Own all of you hard! Moral: EXPLOSION NOISE!

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wondering if everyone else in the world can read your mind so you avoid thinking about specific things

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Get distracted during fap dreams and thinking of your mom and then going OMG GROSS OH GOD IM A PERV!!

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.