When I aak someone out it takes me 3-6 attempts to get the words out

thumb_up thumb_down -152

put a load of loo roll in the loo before taking a dump at work so it silences the landing.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

I type out something I think is funny, then wonder if people will think I'm weird and erase it.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Whenever I read a book, in my head it all takes place at my own house, or some other familiar location.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Thinking our singing voices are amazing, until we record it and play it back.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

clean specks of sh*t in the toilet by peeing on it.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Wish that Mexicans would go ruin their own country instead of ruin ours.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Scratch my ass/armpit and HAVE to smell it.

thumb_up thumb_down -65

Cry every day just because it makes you feel better.

thumb_up thumb_down -89

Walking down the toy isle in the store, and feeling a little sad that you're not a kid anymore.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Even if it's something as innocent as a simple google search, I'm still inexplicably terrified when my parents draw near and could potentially see it. I silently flip out and frantically hide it like it's porn or something. ..And I don't even look at porn :I

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Show desktop when mom or dad walks in.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

I look for comments in this site that are on or close to 0 so that when i like or dislike them, i make a difference to the outcome :)

thumb_up thumb_down -52

okay,So we bought a 1000 piece puzzle and made a point to put it together when it was done we found that it was missing a piece so we went back to the same store bought the same puzzle and went through it until we found the missing piece then returned it.

thumb_up thumb_down -62

Count the number of letters in a word or phrase.

thumb_up thumb_down -66

whenever there's a fight on facebook, i sit back and read it and i'm just like "people are stupid hehe"

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Afraid to do something your crush is doing so they don't think you're stalking them, even though you really want to. -B

thumb_up thumb_down +39

I like to eat grilled cheese with ketchup

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Still can't walk on cracks. If I step on the crack with one foot, the other has to as well.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Cope with serious things by not taking them seriously.

thumb_up thumb_down -59

Pee in the shower.

thumb_up thumb_down -83

Naming you're offspring Peter Jankins

thumb_up thumb_down -141

jack off

thumb_up thumb_down -24

if someone i like or want to impress is around i change the song I'm listening to to something that i know they like or something not embarrassing, just in case they ask me what i'm listening to.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.