Apply hand sanitizer after fapping.

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when liking something you like or dislike something you click it twice even though you know it will only take one vote

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After you wipe your butt and crotch with a towel, you dont want the towel to touch your face. Next night, dry your face and head first.

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Sunday's are making me feel depressed.

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Wearing cheap CZ rings to either stop guys hitting on me or pretend I'm engaged.

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I have an unhealthy obsession with and so always talk about Penge North Korea beige mauve and medium density fiberboard. This explains why I'm such a popular guy

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Pee in the shower.

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I keep thinking a thing is about to fall from the table even though it's not close to the edge

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Miss the bus, keep running pretending I was going somewhere else.

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I really like the day I was born even though there is nothing special about it like Dec 25 or May 20 (Christmas or Independence day)

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I bought a ps4 and really regret it.

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When making something I pretend I'm making a YouTube video of it

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wonder y nobody facebook likes or comments on these

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that movie-like moment when you want to rush out to dance in the rain

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hug the pillow at night so it protects me from monsters

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Download a new app, and say to myself I'll never stop playing it. Play it for 2 hours and forget about it.

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Afraid to do something your crush is doing so they don't think you're stalking them, even though you really want to. -B

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When you're all alone, practice for an interview you're bound to have when you're rich and famous and say other people's responses when they are asked about working with you.

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put a load of loo roll in the loo before taking a dump at work so it silences the landing.

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draw the sun at the corner of the page

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Get worried i'll sleeptalk about the things I'm thinking about and someone will hear, so stop thinking about my deep and personal thoughts i think about before going to bed.

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i open the cuboard door tosee if theres anything to eat and if theres nothing there i close it and go to the fridge if theres nothing there i go back to the cuboard =)

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You try to tell a joke to impress everyone and then you mess it up.

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Flush the toilet right before done peeing so when you're done, the toilet and your pee has been flushed.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.