Fantasize about being with somebody else when I have sex

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When I'm trying to sleep and my mind's like, "Hey, know what's a good movie? Paranormal Activity!" Then I can't sleep for an hour - Brayden Everes

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Waking up at 4 am wondering where your pillow went.

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I don't cut a conversation on the phone short just because I have to use the "facilities". I've mastered the art of being as far away from the toilet while flushing and sprinting out of the bathroom.

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Not laughing at funny things on T.V. because nobody is around.

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When I'm at the checkout and paying with my card, I try to put my PIN in the card machine before the cashier has a chance to tell me to do it.

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I take pains to be Anti-Democrat and Anti-Republican. Because both parties are really gross money & career machines beholden to industry. I really am middle-of-the-road on lots of issues. even though I don't understand what the fuck makes an intelligent conservative tick. but I may just be biased because it's all neo-cons on the news. idk.

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Get angry at someone for not knowing something I haven't told them about.

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Rereading a text message 25 times before you send it to make sure it makes sense.

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Okay so probably like everyone else, when Schapelle Corby was found with drugs on her in bali I thought she was innocent but now since she was let out of the prison I am wondering if she did do it?

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Show up for a blind date and say DAMN, WTF! When they open the door.

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in the morning the first thing I do is pick my nose n eat it n then I smell my discharge

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outside in the dark see a face in the tree thinks its bigfoot come to get me!

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say to my friend do you ever think that someone else is thinking the same thing that they are thinking at this moment in time and then SHYT in there mouth. Normally they gurggle it in their throat, before swallowing it and making a pedo face, and sometimes i bike naked and shit on cars with diorrea so it explodes on the windows.

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Close you closet door whenever you are about to go to bed.

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whenever there is a person I really, really hate, I imagion them dying in a cruel and painful way.

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If im eating food i shouldnt and i dont want anybody to know i jump if anyone comes in and catches me.

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When I am in a car i always think there is massive swords coming out the edge of the car and make everything the same length up

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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when on long car rides look out the window imagineing stick figures running

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go on a diet, buy a lot of healthy food, eat it all the same day. 2 weeks later repeat.

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Hot in bed? Stick one leg out and then wrap it around the top of the duvet

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Turn the light off, run, and JUMP into bed. I'm 26.

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I type out something I think is funny, then wonder if people will think I'm weird and erase it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.