Picking your nose to get rid of that annoying whistling in your nose when you breathe.

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See a ridiculously hot girl and wonder to myself "who is the guy who gets to have sex with her. And why does she like him?" As if that can help me bag an equally hotter girl.

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If im eating food i shouldnt and i dont want anybody to know i jump if anyone comes in and catches me.

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Hate using public bathrooms because everyone can hear you pee.

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I take pains to be Anti-Democrat and Anti-Republican. Because both parties are really gross money & career machines beholden to industry. I really am middle-of-the-road on lots of issues. even though I don't understand what the fuck makes an intelligent conservative tick. but I may just be biased because it's all neo-cons on the news. idk.

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when i m in a car i'll look at the letters on license plates and try to think of words that you can make-or almost make- with those letters

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when bored, i imagine my EXACT plan for the zombie apocalypse, down to what would look cool if i was walking down a desolate street ( i am legend style) :D

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Wearing cheap CZ rings to either stop guys hitting on me or pretend I'm engaged.

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Get angry at someone for not knowing something I haven't told them about.

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in the morning the first thing I do is pick my nose n eat it n then I smell my discharge

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Two minutes after I text the person I like, I check the message to see what time I sent it and what time the person received it, and estimate that it takes the adverage person about a minute to respond and then another minute for you to receive it. so really, if the person likes you, it would take them about 3 minutes to respond. if its five, you automatically assume they hate you.

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when on long car rides look out the window imagineing stick figures running

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When you were in elementary school you thought people laughed at Uranus because it sounds kinda like urine and then wondered why it was so funny; the two only sound remotely alike.

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When I see something on facebook i dont like, I like it just so i can unlike it.

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Sunday's are making me feel depressed.

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Have to suddenly poop while shopping (mainly in Wal-Mart), but don't feel like traveling far to the restroom. So I kneel down in whatever aisle I'm in, casually shove my heel up my butt, and pick up some random item from the shelf and pretend to be interested in it. Finally, when the poop is secure in my butt, I'll put the item back and continue my shopping.

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I always wonder if anyone has a crush on me.

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Laying or sitting down in a really comfy position, then getting up to do something, and when you come back you can't figure out the position you just had.

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Show up for a blind date and say DAMN, WTF! When they open the door.

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Naming you're offspring Peter Jankins

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I eat spoons of dry hot chocolate powder when nobody is around.

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Find it impossible to get rid of the itch on the bottom of my feet or my palms when they're itchy

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okay,So we bought a 1000 piece puzzle and made a point to put it together when it was done we found that it was missing a piece so we went back to the same store bought the same puzzle and went through it until we found the missing piece then returned it.

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When I'm getting shouted out i blur my eyes and think of something else :3

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.