I wonder what a baby is saying when they are telling you off?

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Suddenly thinking that this is all a dream, and having to pinch yourself to make sure it isn´t. Or is it?

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thinking that the 'writing comments procedure' on this website is extremely irritating.

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Secretly think that Flo from the Progressive commercials is bangable.

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Sometimes I kiss my hand and pretend it's a person I like.

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Sometimes, I ask myself philosophical questions. The one that is bugging me now is "If reincarnation is real, why is this life so vivid?"

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Scratch my ass/armpit and HAVE to smell it.

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if someone posts something disgusting but true on this same site, rethink pressing the "thumbs up" button out of embaressment.

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Like a toy until it breaks.

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I daydream and consequently spend twenty minutes having a dump

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Reach past the first two or three slices of bread to get the better, fresher bread towards the middle.

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Take out all the marshmallows in a bowl of Lucky Charms, eat the "cat food" (the dry cereal that looks like dry kitty food!), then put the marshmallows back in the milk and eat them!

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outside in the dark see a face in the tree thinks its bigfoot come to get me!

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put an excessive amount of lead in your pencil

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I put big spaces in between comments

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Look at restaurant signs and realize the font isnt as fancy as you once thought

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Turn the light off, run, and JUMP into bed. I'm 26.

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See a ridiculously hot girl and wonder to myself "who is the guy who gets to have sex with her. And why does she like him?" As if that can help me bag an equally hotter girl.

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When bored, I often fold pieces of paper to make a little point and poke my fingers/hands with it.

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Not expecting anyone to come over, some one knocks on the front door, mute the TV and hope they just go away.

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DAS RITE MODERFOCKER! NOWUN MESSIS WIF FIRLUPE!!' (throws wine in face)

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Before I go to sleep, I imagine what it would be like dating a really hot actor or singer and think of dramatic scenarios that could happen.

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Takes playful flirting way to seriouse.

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Secretly open a packet of something or spray some deodorant in a shop to check what it looks/feels/smells like. Then put it back and pick up the one behind because you just used/opened the one you were just holding.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.