Before I go to sleep, I imagine what it would be like dating a really hot actor or singer and think of dramatic scenarios that could happen.

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Secretly open a packet of something or spray some deodorant in a shop to check what it looks/feels/smells like. Then put it back and pick up the one behind because you just used/opened the one you were just holding.

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Not laughing at funny things on T.V. because nobody is around.

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I always have to google the name of this website, because I always put the words in the wrong consecution.

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say to my friend do you ever think that someone else is thinking the same thing that they are thinking at this moment in time and then SHYT in there mouth. Normally they gurggle it in their throat, before swallowing it and making a pedo face, and sometimes i bike naked and shit on cars with diorrea so it explodes on the windows.

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KICK THE CAN

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When I let water out the bath I swish the water so it makes a little whirlpool

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get so shitfaced you wake up in a closet with piss everywhere

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Wearing cheap CZ rings to either stop guys hitting on me or pretend I'm engaged.

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When I am in a car i always think there is massive swords coming out the edge of the car and make everything the same length up

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Show up for a blind date and say DAMN, WTF! When they open the door.

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Fantasizing about your friends in like 25 years telling there teenage kids about growing up and being friends with you. When you are a huge rich and famous star.

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When I'm in a room with other people, no matter who they are, I make myself choose the person I would tolerate the best having sex with just in case of a disaster and we need to procreate.

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I somtimes think about what I would o if I had a wish and I go into a lot of detail about it in my head and then realize it will never actually happen

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Take out all the marshmallows in a bowl of Lucky Charms, eat the "cat food" (the dry cereal that looks like dry kitty food!), then put the marshmallows back in the milk and eat them!

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Wondering who would cry at your funeral

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Suddenly thinking that this is all a dream, and having to pinch yourself to make sure it isn´t. Or is it?

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Fart at home

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I look for comments in this site that are on or close to 0 so that when i like or dislike them, i make a difference to the outcome :)

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Scratch my ass/armpit and HAVE to smell it.

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go on a diet, buy a lot of healthy food, eat it all the same day. 2 weeks later repeat.

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when your walking past a chain link fence you slide your fingers along it because it feels cool

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I daydream and consequently spend twenty minutes having a dump

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When does eating pop corn, take apart the bag and lick all the extra butter.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.