I let everyone know I'm a lesbian as soon as I meet them, ('cause I wouldn't want to continue talking to someone who hates gays).

Getting the strong urge to "woo" or scream in a large and quiet crowd, such as during church.

Writing d as b and b as d or p as q

You do a retarded dance when a song you don't like comes on

When you get in trouble, think of what you could have said or done so you could've gotten away with it.

realize you are saying your thoughts outloud.

I can't drink while I'm walking I have to stop.

When i play a video game and make some stupid noobish action including suiciding or playing in a lame way, i make sure that if somehow someone sees my screen, he/she notices why i do so.

I tuck all sides of the blanket under my body and feet then over my head and leave a fresh air hole so im in a cocoon of blanket.

Rereading a text message 25 times before you send it to make sure it makes sense.

For some reason I really love to be hated on horsehead network, no idea why, stopped questioning it moments ago... Moral: Know what I mean?

Think someone's watching me so I do cool stuff to impress them just in case they are

sometime i poop in my hand, then put it in the toilet so it makes less noise and the water doesn't splash up my butt.

I have had a dream where my teeth fall out.

Sometimes, I ask myself philosophical questions. The one that is bugging me now is "If reincarnation is real, why is this life so vivid?"

Cross the street or go some other way to avoid the awkward moment of long lasting side by side walking (a move known as the 'overtake') when walking right behind someone who is slightly slower than you.

Daydream about doing unspeakable things(killing, raping, beating, cutting, shooting, ect.) to the person you hate

When you Sitting on the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.

Check my underwear for any sh!t from farts (yes, sometimes my shit comes with a fart) captcha: royal flush

When home alone, I put cans in front of the door so if someone breaks in, I wake up.

I always have excellent manners when eating around others, but when I'm alone I eat like a pig and have no manners.

Looking up 'How to tell if your crush likes you' to get assurance that he/she loves you

Erasing the history cache on the computer after visiting an x rated website.

I like eating chicken clubs with my hands and dip them in ketchup while pretending I am a caveman

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.