I'm constantly struck with this odd sensation that I didn't wipe my ass well enough.

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In school trying to do a small fart because it really hurting and suddnly a earthquake happens

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Open a new google tab when someone walks in the room, even if I wasn't looking at anything bad.

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I cover the mirror on my bedroom door with a sheet at night, because I think the shadows casted in the mirror are gonna get me.

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When I'm laying in bed, I make sure that my feet are covered and not hanging off the edge so that monsters don't eat them in my sleep.

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Being able to scare people by awkwardly standing behind them

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If someone uses a term thats like, in the know, and they ask if i know what it means, ill act like, of course ido, even if i dont, and then ill go home and look it up.

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put an excessive amount of lead in your pencil

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You tell your friends that you hate the Rick roll'd song even though you secretly like it.

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Wonder if anyone doesn't actually talk to themselves for some reason or another at some point in their life. (If so, how can talking to yourself be the first sign of madness? So many people do it...)

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I never let anything go over the toilet when It's open.

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When im alone i have a conversation with myself

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As im about to fall asleep sometimes i feel like im falling and then i have a muscle spasem and wake up.

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Look at pictures of people who lived a long time ago and wonder how they lived without television and the Internet.

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Sometimes I read a whole page of text only to realize I didn't actually read any of it. Then I read it again. Sometimes this happens more than 3 times for one page.

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I walk down the stairs sideways because I'm afraid something will get me.

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I rape small children ;).

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When I walk the streets after getting a new haircut, I think everybody's staring at me and thinking "oh my god she got a new haircut" eventhough they didn't know me before.

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Learn how to say "I love you" in a different language, just to say it to the person you like and observe their dumbfounded expressions.

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While peeing, I will sometimes flush the toilet mid-stream and see if I can finish before it flushes all the way.

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Sometimes when I look at something up close, I alternate closing each eye and looking at the object from the other eye, then switch again. I do it really fast to make it look like that thing is moving. It's really entertaining.

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I masturbate evenly with both hands so that my penis doesn't become crooked.

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when i was i kid i use to do the balloon trick where you rubit on your head then when there is enough put it on a wooden floor and while it's followin me i put my hands out and pretended that i was controlling it

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When someone close to me sadly passes on and later when I am listening to the radio if I hear a song that sounds suitable to that moment I kind of make that our song if that makes sense to any of you

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.