Play with my own boobs for no reason

I think of doing something productive, but can't work up the motivation and end up on the internet instead.

When you say something you think is funny but it turns out that it's only funny in your head so once you say it there's this moment of awkwardness and everyone else probably just forgets about it but it haunts you for the rest of your life. ~

I mean Diana Ross.

Flush the toilet before you finish peeing

worry about your eyebrows sneaking their way up and making wrinkles on your forehead

A lot of times I believe things I see or things that happen are "signs" of something.

Blow on your ice cream for no apparent reason before you eat it.

Sometimes when I'm sitting next to a random person having a conversation with them (in the car for instance) I imagine myself reaching out and holding their hand. I then get super embarrassed just for having the thought.

Always look down at the floor or avoiding any kind of eye contact when your getting told off for something really bad

I like asking my wife how her SIMIANS are doing (the sims 4) because its fun watching her try to hide the fact that it annoys her. Nero, now if you thought Moral Man the Friendly neighbourhood r*pist was bad... Well, thumb me down I dare you! Seriously I totally did not have a certain bitch turkish hacker put a tracker on my laptop si I can find out where you live... And pay some guy to break your kneecaps... I only done it twice though... Here on horsehead network :) Third time is a charm ;) NERO: Actually I paid people five times, the fourth did not do his job, so I pay a fifth to FINISH HIM! (Sometimes I think people on craigslist just like to kill for the fun of it, seriously, eighty bucks?)

Blast yur music in the car when you are alone but when someone pulls up next to you u turn it down so u don't make them think yur an ass

Have a dream about somebody being mean to me. Proceed to be mean to them in real life.

People looking at me when listening to my Ipod. "Can they hear my music?" *turn volume down*

When i was a kid. I really dont care about the story of any animated film. As long as im watching it.

I start doing some of the weird things I wouldn't have thought of doing if I hadn't I read them on this website.

When you think thoughts, you think them in complete sentences as if you were saying them and in your accent.

Whenever I drop food on the floor I get my dog to come clean it for me

Every once in a while I think 'I know you're reading my mind...' and look about the classroom. See if anyone looks at me.

Thinking that out there, on this earth in a lost city, there is an awesome clone of you.

sleep with your legs crossed like your meditating.

Try to make a sound described in a book or text (like a gasp or a gargle)

I T-bag my teammates in MW3 when they die.

When I'm alone with my pet, sometimes we just sit down and stare at each each other for a minute or two

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.