Tell myself that I'm only going for a 20 minute nap and end up sleeping for 1/+ hour(s)...

thumb_up thumb_down -34

eat cake in a bowl with milk the way you would eat a bowl of cereal

thumb_up thumb_down -34

When at a restaurant you practice your order inside your head, then when you actually have to order you mess it up.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Smoking in the shower.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Paranoid someone is reading your mind, so you think something weird to see if they look at you

thumb_up thumb_down -42

after taking a dump i always still smell a little bit of poop and i wonder if other people smell it too

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Have one of those days where you think it is just a dream but then reality takes over

thumb_up thumb_down -44

I get really annoyed by the constant audience laughter in some tv shows even when nothing funny is said

thumb_up thumb_down -44

I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

thumb_up thumb_down -46

expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Put the porn sound in a really low volume even when you have headphones, just to make sure noone can hear it. Then take off the headphones once in a while to check if it sounds too loud.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Show all your friends this website to prove your not as strange as they think you are.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

carry my cat by holding it's front and back legs

thumb_up thumb_down -50

I love the tingly feeling you get when youve shifted after realizing you arm, leg, hand, etc. has gone numb. am i the only one?

thumb_up thumb_down -54

I ship Bolin and Korra as a romance and a bromance. Am I weird for doing this?

thumb_up thumb_down -60

So has anyone else ever been in the middle of doing something and at the exact moment something happens and you sort of wonder if it happened because of what you did.

thumb_up thumb_down -62

I **** with no hands.

thumb_up thumb_down -74

scratch that bit between my balls and arse when it gets itchy, then carry on scratching for ages cos it feels so damn good

thumb_up thumb_down -88

If im taking a crap in the public washrooms and someone walks in I try to make covering noise as soon as its about to plop.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

masturbate as soon as the opportunity arrises. "You'll be home alone all day" "Ok, bye.....*fap fap fap*"

thumb_up thumb_down +27

right after I turn the shower off I jump up and down to get rid of the extra water all over me...

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Sometimes I have something I want to do and then walk into the room to do it in and forget exactly what I was trying to do, it usually involves the kitchen so I just look in the refrigerator then leave and then remember what it is I wanted to do.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.