Flush the toilet before you finish peeing.

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masturbate as soon as the opportunity arrises. "You'll be home alone all day" "Ok, bye.....*fap fap fap*"

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Chew as quietly as possible when eating cookies but as loud as possible when eating fruit.

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Wondering if your life is a TV show, and people are watching what you do.

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I wonder what it wonder be like to have a really tall girlfriend?

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Pretend I'm a back-up dancer or singing a duet with the singer of the song I'm listening to.

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While I Am on the computer late at night, my Mum tells me to go to bed, I say I will in a second. I stay for a few more minutes, my mum tells me again, I do the same thing...

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When no one is home, I poop with the door open, just because I can.

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get happy as sh*t when you remember your homework is do after your lunch period so you can do it then, but never end up doing it.

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I never take drinks into smelly places, out of fear that the smell will somehow get into my drink and contaminate the taste.

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Sleep with pillow between legs

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Sing along to the radio in the car then stop at a red light when you realize other people can see you more easily.

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Think that some minutes feel shorter than others

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Trying to figure out what form of suicide would hurt the least.

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Run into a wall and say "I'm sorry" and then realize that it's just a wall.

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Whenever i do something bad to someone I can't stop smiling even though i never wanted to smile in the first place and i feel like people think I'm a terrible person

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pull out a flies wings and let it go

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Tip my couch over to dig for something I have lost and then end up finding a bunch of random crap.

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When i talk i say i like how or i hate that.

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Put the towel near the shower so that you can stand on it and not get the floor wet

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When you start wondering if you're in a dream and suddenly feel trapped

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i leave tv on when i sleep...cant close it cause i hate to hear....noices...in my bedroom that cant identify......

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I like to watch people and imagine different stories that could explain why they're doing whatever it is that their doing.

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It takes me a whole afternoon to write an important/professional email cause i keep thinking about what I should and should not write and it gets so stupidly difficult I take one hour breaks between every sentence.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.