The volume level on my TV has to be either an even number or a multiple of five.

When I haven't looked in a mirror for a while, I worry that I look awful, and when I get to a mirror, I'm like "Oh yeah, that's what I look like".

Whenever on a car ride, pretend you are in a military convoy and shoot at pursuing helicopters and soldiers.

I spin around in a spot, and then close my eyes and tilt my head up and to the opposite side i'm spinning to. It just feels awesome and it's even better while listening to music.

Until just recently, I thought apple juice was made by the pee of the company. Just that they added sugar.

For some reason some guy at the office started calling me "Biggus Dickus" and that became my nickname from there on... ...Cant help but smirk whenever my female employees gather and ask one another "But what is that Biggus Dickus guys real name? Is he really "Biggus Dickus? Such a strange name, should we call him Biggus Dickus or? etc" Nero the clit collector: AND THEY WONDER WHY I REFUSE TO TELL THEM MY REAL NAME XD They even have bets to see which one can guess "Biggus Dickus`s" real name... ...WHAT? YOU COLLECT STAMPS! THATS TWICE AS CRUEL... Besides you got like ten, I got about 300.005.

Whenever you make cereal, you eat exactly where you make it like on the table.

I flush the toilet if the water's green and I'm going to have a poo, so it doesn't splash me.

That feeling you get where you slip on something but you save yourself just in time and your just like "holy crap, i almost cracked my head and died," then two minutes later your legs are still shaking

When I'm walking and I step on a crack with my left food, the next time I step on a crack it has to be my right foot and vise versa. I can't step on a crack twice in a row with the same foot. But I don't have to step on every crack.

Taking the time to lick all of the cream off of the inside of an Oreo.

When A situation Doesn't go how I wanted it to go, It annoys me so much I sometimes shit in my hands and clap.

i talk to myself in the mirror just to see how i look when im talking to somebody else, i even practice faces and my laugh (i should get a life)

While talking on the phone you can't think of anything to say then it gets awkwardly quiet

Smoking in the shower.

Eat everything inside my burgers first then i eat the buns.

I often try to visualise and merge my faces with various girls i could potentially fall for, just to assess how our future children would look like.

walking up steps in the dark and you think you've gotten to the top but there's actually one more step and you panic because you think your going to fall

Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

Sneeze for a few minutes when I've eaten too much.

I get really annoyed by the constant audience laughter in some tv shows even when nothing funny is said

Ur mum

Sometimes when I look in the mirror I act out a scene like Tyra banks coming up to me and asking me to be on America's next top model.

I think something is gonna get me at night when I walk out of my brothers roomso I look behind me and run and usually bump into a wall

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.