If people knew what I am really thinking about while they are talking to me... YIKES!

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Paranoid someone is reading your mind, so you think something weird to see if they look at you

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While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

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Turn the door knob while closing the door ...so it doesn't make a loud noise.

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walking up steps in the dark and you think you've gotten to the top but there's actually one more step and you panic because you think your going to fall

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I have tried jumping in an airplane to see if I fall in the same spot

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Cringe when remembering something weird about you that happened years ago

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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a hardon and make people think it's that big all time.

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Go outside to meet a friend but he cancelled so you stay in your garage so your parents don't know you're there

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standing at the mall with your group talking, you all decide to start walking to a store, start to follow but half the group stays behind for a few seconds then they start walking, walk a slower pace only to find out that you're in the middle of your split groups e.g. 3 in front 4 behind...dont know which one to merge to......wait for your group to collaborate back together.

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Having more dificulty thinking in your native language than your 2nd or 3rd one. Or 4th one. Or... the rest. I highly doubt that one's common.

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Drive slow in straightaways and fast through curves, especially sharp ones.

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I twerk in the mirror to see how much my ass jiggles

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Check every spoon fork and knife in the silverware drawer for spots or old food before you choose which one to eat with

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I waTch 2 GIRLS AND 1 CUP AND I FAPPED THOSE BITCHES MANY TIMES! HELL YEA! /M\

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So has anyone else ever been in the middle of doing something and at the exact moment something happens and you sort of wonder if it happened because of what you did.

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When passed by a very attractive girl in the street, turn around and look after her and/or follow her to the next street corner, in order to grasp more of her beauty.

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Kill Jb without getting aressted.

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only drink milk from a freshly opened carton

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Sometimes I blow my nose on yesterday's socks because it is the closest thing to the bed in the morning and I'm too lazy to get up and go for a tissue. O_o

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I pee in the sink so i don't have to aim

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I gotta get down of Friday

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(Men) When you have to poop and pee at the same time, you stand to pee, and THEN sit to poop. Just out of principle.

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When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.