fart and then breathe it in really quick hoping no one else smells it first

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Everytime my sibling starts a sentance with "I remember when","I have an idea"etc.,I get up and walk out.

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Freak out at sudden noises when home alone at night.

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When A situation Doesn't go how I wanted it to go, It annoys me so much I sometimes shit in my hands and clap.

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Click an invisible pen I think is in my hand but is not constantly everyday.

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Looking at something suggestive on your computer and worrying that someone else in your family can see what you're doing on their computer.

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For some reason some guy at the office started calling me "Biggus Dickus" and that became my nickname from there on... ...Cant help but smirk whenever my female employees gather and ask one another "But what is that Biggus Dickus guys real name? Is he really "Biggus Dickus? Such a strange name, should we call him Biggus Dickus or? etc" Nero the clit collector: AND THEY WONDER WHY I REFUSE TO TELL THEM MY REAL NAME XD They even have bets to see which one can guess "Biggus Dickus`s" real name... ...WHAT? YOU COLLECT STAMPS! THATS TWICE AS CRUEL... Besides you got like ten, I got about 300.005.

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eat cake in a bowl with milk the way you would eat a bowl of cereal

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I have to stop the Microwave on 0 but before it beeps or I'm not going to get what I want in life. OCD MUCH

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in a grocery store, only walking on the colored single tiles the entire time your in there pretending there small cliffs without touching the white one otherwise you fall and fail.

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When masturbating at night, looking at the window paranoid that someone is watching. But stopping or moving out of view.

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The power to put a pointless super power on thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com

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If my SOLVE media is too long I refresh it to give me a shorter one

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When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

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not eating the ends of a hotdog.

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I get really annoyed by the constant audience laughter in some tv shows even when nothing funny is said

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When you're chatting with a friend while you're walking around and not really paying attention then you turn around to took at your friend and you realise you've been talking to someone you don't even know the entire time.

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I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because f*ck the NSA.

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Masturbate. Sometimes two or three times a day.

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Panic when your car alarm goes off while you are going to get in because you suddenly look like a criminal.

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Put the porn sound in a really low volume even when you have headphones, just to make sure noone can hear it. Then take off the headphones once in a while to check if it sounds too loud.

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Somethings thinking: O God, I love this world.

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When I'm walking I look up at nothing in particular and it causes everyone else to look up too!

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When you are thinking, and you think about what you are thinking. You are automatically purposely thinking until you stop thinking about it. I am thinking about thinking about how I think right now. I think...

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.