Whenever I'm outside playing a sport or something I pretend I have a tv show and I'm giving the audience a tutorial on how to do whatever I'm doing.

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watch reality t.v. when you're feeling guilty and think to yourself "at least I'm not as bad as that"

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WHEN I SHOW YOU A PICTURE ON MY PHONE..DON’T SWIPE LEFT.DON’T SWIPE RIGHT.JUST LOOK. Via: Collection of Love WhatsApp Status

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When passed by a very attractive girl in the street, turn around and look after her and/or follow her to the next street corner, in order to grasp more of her beauty.

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Sometimes I wonder how food tastes when not drowned in ketchup.

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I get mad at women because they menstruate and that's gross. I don't judge one woman individually for it, but I'm disgusted with the whole gender, which leads to being almost disgusted with myself for being attracted to them.

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when walking i always count how many steps i have taken as i go

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....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Start to cry when your alone, but stop yourself because you don't want to look like a pussy.

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Sometimes I wait a long time to pee when I really have to go. It feels good.

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Make up a song to yourself.

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When you are outside, you see a small shadow moving across the ground. You think it's a ball someone threw, so you look up to catch it, only to realize it is a bird.

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Wipe the salt off your hand on your right pant leg after eating salty fries from fast food restaurants.

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Pretend I'm a back-up dancer or singing a duet with the singer of the song I'm listening to.

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When I hear footsteps approaching while I'm sitting on the toilet, I'm getting ready to jump at the door in case I actually forgot to lock it.

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I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

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Love the natural smell of my dog's paws.

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I hit the frig after sex

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When I was younger I'd lay in bed & think about who I would pick if a person told me that I had to choose between 2 people and the 1 that I don't choose will die.

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I am a masculine guy but in private I listen to very sensitive songs. ie: careless wispers

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Imagining how it would feel to switch bodies with your crush

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Sometimes I think that if we play with dolls, maybe we're just dolls that someone is playing with and creating lives for.

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sometimes when im in the shower and i hear the slightest bump i look behind the curtains to see if anyone is about to scare me

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.