- Things You Think Only You Do

Sometimes I think that if we play with dolls, maybe we're just dolls that someone is playing with and creating lives for.

cover myself in vaseline and roll around on the floor pretending im a slug

Guessing on those annoying Captcha things and then getting unnecessarily angry when it tells you you're wrong.

sometimes when im in the shower and i hear the slightest bump i look behind the curtains to see if anyone is about to scare me

Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

Sometimes when I fart while sitting down, I lift one leg up.

Wonder what random strangers look like or noises and such they make while having sex. Everyone literally. People you interact with at work , customers, your boss, the married couple. Except for people who are like dirty looking af. Our just straight up ugly. Then your like grossed out by those thoughts your having and start getting that home sickfeeling in your stomach. Almost like butterflies but like dead ones or something. Hard to explain.

Sometimes I find myself staring at the television only to realize its off.

When I'm around people, I sometimes yell in my head "STOP READING MY MIND! I KNOW YOU'RE DOING IT, SO STOP!" just in case.

fart and then breathe it in really quick hoping no one else smells it first

Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

When masturbating at night, looking at the window paranoid that someone is watching. But stopping or moving out of view.

Going to sleep during class thinking that you've written down all your notes, until you wake up and realize you did nothing.

I think Frozen is an overrated film

feel like im being watched turn my head sideways and see someone suddenly look away.

Eat everything inside my burgers first then i eat the buns.

I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

Paranoid someone is reading your mind, so you think something weird to see if they look at you

forget to breathe while listening to ear buds too loudly.

At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a hardon and make people think it's that big all time.

I have tried jumping in an airplane to see if I fall in the same spot

Try to move your head to line up specks on the windshield with objects outside.

Hate when I can't sleep and the sun starts to come up and I hear birds chirping and i get worried and just realize that I should be happy that it's a new day and to relax.

Imagine myself going back in time and giving my friends and family little hints on how their life will pan out.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.