Whenever i do something bad to someone I can't stop smiling even though i never wanted to smile in the first place and i feel like people think I'm a terrible person

Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

When receiving instructions from people one on one, whether it's a man or a woman, I wonder what they would do if I kissed them while they are talking.

Try stick to something but fail in the end

Sometimes I think that if we play with dolls, maybe we're just dolls that someone is playing with and creating lives for.

never wanting to poop in other houses. You have to use your toilet

Whenever I drop food on the floor I get my dog to come clean it for me

Make sure I put the deodorant top back on the correct way -- you know, so the sticker is to the front.

I try to sympathize when some celebrity butthole has problems but, I can't.

When I dont feel like sweeping I sweep the stuff under the fridge or something

when i have a head or toothache...i hit it harder thinking it will stop or get better

while I am sitting on the toilet I play with it and waste the toilet paper and of course i just keep flushing it

Listening to romantic hollywood sad core and feeling depressed because your single.

Whenever I'm chewing on gum that has lost its flavor, I extract the gum from my mouth using my fingers before putting it back in so the flavor would return.

After peeling an apple, I will put the apple in a zip-lock and hold it through the plastic so my hands won't get sticky while I eat it.

Imagine I'm being filmed in a reality TV show just so I could do something productive or interesting.

Walking around on the streets wondering if you are really walking in place, and the earth is spinning according to how you walk, like a treadmill.

Sometimes I think my shit smells delicious... and I cant believe I am actually not only typing it here, but "finally" admitting it to myself.

I deeply pick my nose with tweezers. It's like the relief of pooping to me.

I giggle in my head when anyone says duty.

You take showers on school morning because you like to stand there under the hot water just thinking about life while your warm

Hide important things in places at home but forget later where you hid them.

When your at your friends house and they run out of toilet paper, so you sit there like "what do i do now?"

look at bins as i walk past them

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.