when im lying in bed and fart i bring the blanket up to my nose and smell it. And nod in approval..

taking a shit while brushing my teeth.

Wipe my hands on a cold glass to clean my hands

Sometimes I wonder if my life is a dream and oneday I'll wake up as a newborn baby

Open the microwave door exactly when your food ends.

When the T.V switches to commercial sometimes I forget what I was watching Noel

whenever i'm holding a kitchen knife, i feel super weird like i'm gonna stab someone.... its not like i would ever do that, but i think about what would happen if i just impaled the person that is standing near me with a huge knife.

Delete the whole password when I mess up only the one letter.

When bored in School, I like to imagine what I would do at that exact moment if a Zombie Apocalypse started.

When my girlfriend ask me what I am thinking about, I tell her I am thinking of all the great things about my last girlfriend.

Try tosing in the same tone and impersonate a girl voice while listening to music in my room, but then quickly start humming in a low voice when someones walking by -Ethan

1. When you're downstairs at night you go upstairs as fast as fucking possible. 2. When you switch volume in TV, the second number has to be 0 or 5.

try to get abs by doing the stupidest things

Make a day of reading posts from Craiglist's Best-Of.

Make sure I put the deodorant top back on the correct way -- you know, so the sticker is to the front.

When the font allows it, try to hide the cursor in capital I's.

Make odd grunting noises and sighs of relief while going #2.

Close all the windows on my computer when parents walk in.

Sometimes I think my shit smells delicious... and I cant believe I am actually not only typing it here, but "finally" admitting it to myself.

Listening to music walking through town and feeling like you're in a music video

The only time I seem to look at the clock is when the numbers read my birth date.

I giggle in my head when anyone says duty.

At any time of day, when i'm not busy, someone you know pops into your head and you start talking to them telepathically, but not for long, then you realise that youre just plain crazy? anyone?

not eating the ends of a hotdog.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.