try to get abs by doing the stupidest things

Whenever I hear a baby or a young child scream very loud, I imagine that their head will explode.

Lay in bed , and think what i could of said while i was talking to my crush or what could of happen.

brush the dandruff from my eyebrows

watch lesbian porn instead of normal because you hate have other men in the picture

Right after moving to a new place I check my room for hidden cameras.

Sometimes while texting or messaging, I enact the physical gestures that accompany what I'm saying as if it were an in-person conversation, even though no one can see me.

How funny would it be if plants were trying to kill us but they move too slow to get us

shit corn, even though i havent recently eaten corn.

Accidently send an empty text or text multiple people and send wrong text to wrong person

when you're texting in class and you realize you are staring at your crotch and smiling.

Sometimes hold a piece of chocolate between your fingers until it melts then lick the yummy gooeyness off your fingers

when you are you a self flushing urinal/toilet you think it is a tiny camera and think someone is watching you so you rush to finish using the bathroom

I read the down voted posts

Whenever I pull a long hair from my vagina or butt, it feels good.

I used to peep when my relatives are watching porn, back when i was a kid. After that, i feel like i wanna pee.

Just ocassionally stand up and pontlessly walk around the house when using the computer. Anyone?

when im alone i pretend to sniper zombies out my bedroom window

i fap in the bathroom because its the only room i have a reason to lock the door in.

At night, everytime when i walk past that curtain lampost, it goes off.

Touch something dirty with one hand then wash it but then wash the other hand cause it feels weird when it's not wet like your other hand.

I hold in my shit only because i am soo occupied with my current task.

fall asleep in the shower.

Try to keep a balloon in the air with out touching the ground, using anything but my hands -Noel

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.