Sometimes I cant sleep without something making noise , like a fan .

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Hoping if I fall asleep on the couch while my family is in the room I dont have a dream about sex and wake up moaning and groaning...

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See my "double reflection" in 2 mirrors and then get freaked out for a good ten minutes that my usual image of myself is actually the flipped version...

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I probably am the only one who does this but I climb on my cat's cat tree to see what it's like to be a cat o.o

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Walk around downtown and spot good camping spots or sniping spots, cause life is a FPS.

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Poo really loud

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If I have to put the garbage out at night I sprint back into the house so the monsters don't get me

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When i think about something hilarious that happened previously and laugh about it days later at the most innappropriate time.

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Imagine punching someone you hate in the face, but when you see them in person you think "Oh s***!!!!" and hide.

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Think about breathing...

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I love to garden and I love flowers. I refuse to have a window box because I don't want those creepy Sesame Street twiddlebugs to live that close to my house.

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when you are at home doing something then all of a sudden you imagine how you would take down a killer if he came into your home right now. just me?

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Wish you could delete a post if it gets thumbs down

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I like asking my wife how her SIMIANS are doing (the sims 4) because its fun watching her try to hide the fact that it annoys her. Nero, now if you thought Moral Man the Friendly neighbourhood r*pist was bad... Well, thumb me down I dare you! Seriously I totally did not have a certain bitch turkish hacker put a tracker on my laptop si I can find out where you live... And pay some guy to break your kneecaps... I only done it twice though... Here on horsehead network :) Third time is a charm ;) NERO: Actually I paid people five times, the fourth did not do his job, so I pay a fifth to FINISH HIM! (Sometimes I think people on craigslist just like to kill for the fun of it, seriously, eighty bucks?)

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Sometimes at night, I find myself imagining people I know saying my name, trying to get my attention in my head. They won't stop until I respond out loud.

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Thinking about what is nothing and other deep shit when trying to fall asleep.

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Imagine a little person trapped and about to be crushed in the progress bar.

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I use my magic powers to give shaddy politicians their comeuppance (I don't have any magic powers lol)

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When you look in the mirror, and it ruins your whole day.

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When you're scared of the bathroom and you close your eyes you quickly look around to check if there's a monster or something in the mirror

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putting your hand in the water in the back of the toilet and thinking its gross toilet water and get grossed out

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I sit up all night on the computer/xbox then when people ask if i have slept i just lie and say yes to avoid the drama.

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After going to the toilet to do a S#!* I will only sit on one cheek for the rest of the day until I bathe

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eat the muffin bottom because it isn't as good as the top and i want to get it over with

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.