Feel really paranoid until my game score is a multiple of 5

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Sometimes there is a hair in my butt and then I pull it slowly out. And it feels funny.

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I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

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get under the covers and curl up into a ball to get warm really fast

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After going to the toilet to do a S#!* I will only sit on one cheek for the rest of the day until I bathe

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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I lay in bed at night with my eyes closed but not asleep,and my mind will tell me that thier is someone standing by my bed,i will think and say to myself,im not looking because thats ridiculous. Then after a 30 seconds pause,have a quick peep.

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Sometimes I imagine that I am in a coma and all of the things of this world are not real. Then when I wake up from the coma I will be the best inventor of all time.

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it is not disgusting to bite your toe nails, it is a skill

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When in shower, I turn the heat to max for a few minutes to warm up the whole bathroom.

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Getting secretly pissed off when people don't like your birthday post on their Facebook wall.

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Sing along to the radio in the car then stop at a red light when you realize other people can see you more easily.

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Whenever I hear a baby or a young child scream very loud, I imagine that their head will explode.

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Drop something down the side of the couch, say that you'll get it in a minute and then forget about it

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Multi task while your brushing your teeth and forget you have a tooth brush in your mouth.

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Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

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Poking my self under the covers just to not falleth asleepeth (t -_-)zzzzzz

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Whenever I go to close the door to my room, I give the wall opposite me a hard, intimidating stare just in case an invisible person was watching me.

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I don't know about anyone else but I really felt bad when the Lich killed Prismo in Adventure Time

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Accidently send an empty text or text multiple people and send wrong text to wrong person

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When reading a book where the main character has the same name as someone I know, I visualize that character in my head as that person.

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When I dry my hair after showering I put a towel on my head and look at the mirror pretending I am a mighty naked sheik.

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I used to drive home from my girlfriend's house late at night and stop on a stretch of road to take a leak. I'd walk backwards while peeing, creating a crooked line of pee in the road. I'd add to it night after night, then I'd drive by in the day to see my long pee stain in the road only I knew about. Anyone who passed by could see it, but only I knew what it was. It would last until the next rain and I'd have to start over.

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when i watch a movie, and a character in it gos underwater, i hold my breath with that person until that person gets above water, then i let go, either that, after the character comes up from the water, i still hold my breath until i cant take it anymore.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.