filling your mouth with water in the shower and spitting it at the wall.

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Slowly close the fridge door to see when the light bulb turns off.

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Imagine a little person trapped and about to be crushed in the progress bar.

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Nodding while talking on the phone then remembering the person can't see you

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eat the muffin bottom because it isn't as good as the top and i want to get it over with

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I try to say something, but a bunch of people are talking at the same time so I yell at them to shut up and as soon as I say something I realize I was wrong so I say"okay" as calm as possible to keep from looking like a douche

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Sniff or tap to a rhythm to some sort of beat I composed in my head...

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whenever i'm holding a kitchen knife, i feel super weird like i'm gonna stab someone.... its not like i would ever do that, but i think about what would happen if i just impaled the person that is standing near me with a huge knife.

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When I'm home alone, I start hearing random noises and think someone is breaking in.

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I piss in the bed every night

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Sometimes when you're at work and you're REALLY horny, you look around at the women you work with and think who you really would like to bone, then on another particular day when you aren't horny, you see the same women and think to yourself " I must have REALLY been horny. What was I thinking?" lol (not trying to be gross, but honestly, who doesn't get horny while at work sometimes)

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Waiting alone inside a public toilet for someone to come in and open the door.... so you don't have to touch the handle!

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Whenever I drop food on the floor I get my dog to come clean it for me

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Try to stop a stopwatch exactly on 1 second with no extra milliseconds

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wipe your armpit and then sniff it to see how bad you smell

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Sometimes I think of doing really bad things and smirk, only to later regret even thinking of it and start questioning myself while feeling bad about it.

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Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

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Toss something across the room toward the place it belongs, get excited when it lands upright/ perfectly in place, then immediately regret you weren't recording it.

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I feel that getting a 98 on a test is better than getting a 99.

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Hang something small in front of the webcam, in case someone is secretly watching me.

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When I am making toast I spread the butter or jam with a spoon

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When there are multiple puddles on the sidewalk you try and jump in every single one of them

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I drive in the car then suddenly awake from a day dream and realize ive driven for the last 4 miles with no recollection of the journey.

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Keep things on my body equal. ex. Hold something in my right hand so I hold something equally heavy in my left hand.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.