How funny would it be if plants were trying to kill us but they move too slow to get us

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shit corn, even though i havent recently eaten corn.

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Accidently send an empty text or text multiple people and send wrong text to wrong person

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when you're texting in class and you realize you are staring at your crotch and smiling.

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Feels my beard with my tongue.

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Sometimes hold a piece of chocolate between your fingers until it melts then lick the yummy gooeyness off your fingers

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I read the down voted posts

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Just ocassionally stand up and pontlessly walk around the house when using the computer. Anyone?

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Whenever I pull a long hair from my vagina or butt, it feels good.

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I used to peep when my relatives are watching porn, back when i was a kid. After that, i feel like i wanna pee.

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when im alone i pretend to sniper zombies out my bedroom window

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At night, everytime when i walk past that curtain lampost, it goes off.

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Touch something dirty with one hand then wash it but then wash the other hand cause it feels weird when it's not wet like your other hand.

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Unable to be near my cat without petting her or talking to her.

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fall asleep in the shower.

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You tell your friends that you hate the Rick roll'd song even though you secretly like it.

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Try to keep a balloon in the air with out touching the ground, using anything but my hands -Noel

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Videotape my mother in the shower.

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in the morning when you wake up and take a shower you make weird faces to stretch out and "warm up" your face for the day

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Drum on the chair between your legs and wonder if people think that you're playing with yourself.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Use the toilet shower to wipe your a**, but denies the fact until death for your friends.

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Think of someone you love while trying to fall asleep.

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If I have to put the garbage out at night I sprint back into the house so the monsters don't get me

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.